I Have A Secret
by GreenEyedBabe
Summary: Hermione has a secret! She used Polyjuice potion to get over the crush she could never have. Now she has a new interest that is even more impossible. Can she get the hair she needs? What happens when she gets caught by the blond she's after? rated MA
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: **This is a Christmas Challenge by Mistress Malfoy at Granger Enchanted, but I can't seem to upload it there for whatever reason and it's annoying the hell out of me. I had plans of uploading here anyway, so you guys get it first. The Prompt: Polyjuice- she liked to play, but there's no harm in that, is there? Well until she was caught retrieving a hair from a certain Blond Pure-blood. This is the first challenge I've ever tried taking and let me tell you, it's harder than I thought it was. Deadlines suck.  
_

_Still getting to my reviews on Tabby's and Snakes, but I promise I'll get to them all very soon. As always, Please Read and Review. Merry Christmas Everyone!_

**_Special thanks to DirtyThings for getting this looked over before the deadline. You did a fantastic job and I appreciate it, love._**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own anything Pertaining to the HP universe. I write for fun, for free, and subject others to my pervy nature. lol._**

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**Chapter 1  
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_This is wrong. I can't do this again. I'm going to get caught one day, and it's going to be awful when it happens,_ she kept thinking to herself as she stirred the simmering cauldron she'd been working at for almost a month now. The soft twinkling lights of the winter holiday added a touch of cheer to the room as she worked.

_It was one thing when it was just once to get over a teenage crush. It is another with what you've been planning as of late_, her brain told her as she added in a counterclockwise turn to the potion.

Setting her stirring rod down, Hermione sighed in her now silent flat. Glancing at the pretty Christmas tree that sat in the corner, she shook her head at herself. _What are you doing?_ she asked herself for the umpteenth time. _ This is insane. If anyone finds out...you'll be ruined. _

She barely remembered how it started all those months ago. She'd been fed up, that part she remembered for sure. She'd been having a bad day at work-well, bad week really, and then to top it off, Ron was trying to start things up between them again.

He didn't seem to understand that she didn't want to date him any longer. They'd tried it and it didn't work. She wasn't even sure why she'd once thought she was attracted to him. He annoyed the living piss out of her on a regular basis and had for years.

She'd been staying at Grimmauld Place while her flat was being fumigated, and the whole complex had to be tented off while it happened. Something about..._termites? _ She thought she remembered hearing that.

It was a Saturday when the idea first hit her. Harry was off with Ron doing something she knew she cared nothing about. Remus was out running errands down in Diagon Alley, Sirius was out doing Lord knew what, and that had left her in a large house, all alone. She was bored out of her mind, sick of reading for once in her life. Mainly it was sound of her own inner monologue as she read that made her put her book down, so she'd started wandering about the place.

Touring all of downstairs, though tour might not have been the right word, she slowly made her way up the steps instead. She passed Harry's room, the door closed, so she moved on. She didn't bother seeing if it was unlocked. Passing Ron's room, she'd sighed at the mess that was inside it, but moved on again.

Remus had his door shut, but she gave the knob a turn. She didn't go in simply because she knew with his werewolf senses, he'd notice her scent that would undoubtedly linger. Glancing about, she quickly shut the door again.

Coming across Sirius' room, she saw that his door was open as well. Knowing she was alone, a quick spell on the stairs to alert her if anyone came home, she went inside.

She'd had a terrible crush on him as a teenager. He'd always flirted with her, harmlessly of course, but it had made her day every time he did it. Calling her Kitten, sending her a wink and a smile, a wiggle of his eyebrows as he teased her about her books. It was a crush she'd never fully gotten over.

These days, he still called her "Kitten" now and again if he teased her, but he didn't flirt nearly as much as he used to. Though, honestly, she wasn't around much these days either. Plus, even though she was older now, twenty-seven years old to be exact, he still saw her as his godson's best friend. Saw her as that fifteen year old he'd met, or maybe he did see her as twenty-seven, but just didn't see her as someone worth his time, though she wasn't sure that was a fair assessment either.

Either way, he didn't look at her like she was someone that he could do more than be friendly to, even though some days she really wished that he would wake up and really notice her.

She always wondered what might have happened had she been older when they met. Would he have looked at her and not seen his godson's best friend? Looked at her as something other than a child that he liked to tease and pick at gently while smiling at her in an adorable way? Someone attractive and worth his time and effort in seducing, even if only for a one-time affair?

She didn't know, but it didn't matter. She had been a child then, and now that she wasn't, he didn't look at her that way. Or if he did, he sure as hell did a great job at hiding it.

She knew that he knew that she wasn't a virgin by any means. She'd been with men before and even had..._what was the proper term? _ A man might deem the odd relationship as a piece of fluff if they were sleeping with a woman and it was only about sex. _But did women have men that were pieces of fluff? _

She didn't see her "fluff" often. Only when she had an itch, as it were. They both knew what it was and were both fine with it. He was a wizard she'd met while at University, one that she'd started sleeping with now and then during their last two years there, mainly to ease the stress for them both with the hard course work they'd been taking.

But as she wandered about Sirius' room, breathing in the scent that lingered, she'd trailed her hand over the short stack of books he'd left on a small table. Picking up a shirt the man had discarded earlier that rested on a chair, she brought it to her face, letting it caress her cheeks as she breathed in his scent again, now stronger with the material pressed against her nose.

_I really need to get over this stupid crush,_ she thought as she set the shirt down. With a sigh of annoyance at herself, she moved onto his dresser, and she spied his brush. Reaching out a hand, she trailed her fingers over the thing that sifted through the man's shaggy black hair, but a few hairs had gotten tangled in her finger as she pulled away, the black strands dangling from her fingers.

She stared at the strands as the most insane idea ever hit her. He might never look at her or try to seduce her, but there were still a way to have him. A way of being with him, even if only once. She honestly had no clue where the idea came from as she pulled the hairs that were wrapped around her fingertips free.

But when the idea hit, she dismissed it, shaking it off and rolling her eyes. It was many things, but most of all it was wrong. _Wasn't it? _To use those hairs, to slip it into a potion she knew she could brew. The use that same brew on her "fluff." To make him become Sirius Black just for a night, a night on which she knew she'd shag the utter hell out of the transformed man that had haunted her dreams so much as a teen, and occasionally as an adult.

Instead of dropping the hairs like she should have, or even putting them back on the brush as she could have, she pulled out her wand and conjured a tiny plastic bag to slip the few strands into.

She debated it long and hard, looking at the situation from every angle. The thing that finally tipped the scales was when her every-now-and-again lover mentioned that he'd always fantasized about shagging a certain witch that he knew. One that didn't look at him at all. He sighed as he said that it was too bad, because he'd really wanted the witch.

That's what started their arrangement. She'd take a potion one night, becoming the witch he wanted and couldn't get. Then, on another night, he'd take a potion and become Sirius for her.

Hermione wondered if she should get her head examined for doing this. But really, where was the harm? She got to fulfill some rather interesting fantasies and no one knew her little secret but her lover, Brian. She knew he'd never breath a word of it. It would come out about what he'd done too and she knew he didn't want that to happen either.

She had shagged her Sirius doppelganger again and again until she was over her silly crush, which was what she'd hoped for to begin with. Only, she'd found a new person to lust after. A new fantasy that teased her mind and senses. But who she wanted now was impossible.

Now with Christmas almost upon them, she thought she should be committed for even thinking about what she was planning. But really, who didn't look at the platinum**-**haired wizard and drool at least a tiny bit. He was sexy as hell.

His pale skin, silver eyes, and long blond hair drew her eyes. The intensity of his gaze as he looked at someone was hypnotizing. She already knew that under all his finely tailored clothes, he had a sexy body that just begged to be touched and stroked.

She knew what had started her even thinking about him**,** too. She'd been to see Ginny at Malfoy Manor and the two had wandered about while talking, Ginny having married Draco two years ago. Their wandering had ended up in the room that held the indoor pool, and as they just chatted back and forth, the sound of a splash drew their gaze.

Ginny was used to seeing the elder Malfoy swimming, but Hermione wasn't. Seeing the sculpted muscles of his chest, dripping with water as he stood and slicked his hair back, Hermione's lips parted in shock.

Eyes on his chest, her gaze landed on the single line of pale blond hair that traveled down his flat belly and toned abdomen until it disappeared into his swimming trunks. Tracing the line with her eyes, she swallowed the lump that formed at the sight as the man wiped the water from his face, not paying them any mind.

Luckily, she'd stopped ogling the man before he saw her doing it, and Ginny had pulled her along to finish their conversation. But that's what started her thinking about her newest fantasy. She wanted Lucius Malfoy and with just a single hair, she could get him.

Only, she had no clue as to how she'd get the hair. She couldn't pull one from his brush; she had no reason to go into his private chambers. She couldn't try to snag one, even with a faked fall in front of him or something, because he was rarely around her to be able to do so.

Honestly, she just needed to stop the whole Polyjuiced lover escapades all together. It was getting ridiculous and she was going to get caught one day. If her secret ever got out, she didn't want to think of the reactions to her friends if they knew of all the times she'd shagged Sirius. Or at least Brian, who looked had like Sirius with the potion he took.

Now, staring at the Christmas tree that was festively lit, she heard a tap at her window. Moving to open it, she smiled as a beautiful eagle owl flew in, landing on the back of one of her dining room chairs. She removed the letter the owl carried and offered it a treat, but the haughty look on the bird's face said that he didn't want her meager offering.

"Take it, or go away. I don't have anything else to offer you right now," She said, annoyed that the bird would give her attitude over a treat.

The bird gave an almost disdained hoot and flew off. With a roll of her eyes, Hermione didn't even have to look at the signature to know who sent it. The owl's manner dripped of Malfoy snobbery. So the letter must be from Ginny.

Tearing the wax seal with the Malfoy emblem on it, she pulled out a thick piece of parchment and read the pretty invitation.

_**You're cordially invited to join in the Christmas celebratory ball at Malfoy Manor hosted by Lucius Malfoy, his son Draco Malfoy, and his daughter-in-law Ginerva Malfoy. **_

The more Hermione read, the more her lips started to curve. Maybe it wasn't so impossible after all. If Lucius Malfoy is hosting the party, then I might have a chance to snag a hair, or two, or three, she thought, contemplating a repeat performance with the luscious blond if it was possible.

Seeing that the party was to be held very soon, Hermione nodded to herself. _Looks like I need to go shopping for a new evening gown._ A smile graced her lips as she went to check on the final stages of her simmering potion.

The day of the party, she left work early, going home to start the long process of getting ready for a formal and elegant ball, like the one she was attending that night.

After taking a shower, she wrapped a towel around herself and quickly dried off. Rubbing her favorite scented lotion into her skin, the smell of honeysuckle and sweet jasmine filled the air around her.

She pulled on her knickers, deep red with black trimmed lace. The dress she'd picked out would leave her back bare, minus the narrow straps that crisscrossed, meaning she couldn't wear a bra. Next came her hair.

With several complicated charms, her hair curled down her back smoothly, the frizz long gone, with the sides pulled up into an elegant knot on the back of her head. The style would keep it out of her face, but still allow a few a tendrils to trail down either cheek. Adding a pair of diamond studs to her ears, she moved on to her make-up.

Finishing up the make-up charms that Ginny had forced her to learn after the war, she headed back into her bedroom to slip on the dress. The black, silky material felt cool and sexy against her skin, the bodice fitted and emphasizing her rounded breasts and slender waist, showing the slight curve of her hip before flowing down to her ankles.

A slit in the side of the dress starting at mid-thigh showed her left leg, but the one thing that drew her to the dress was the zippered front. The zipper looked like a slithering snake that started just between her breasts, curving back down her belly to end at the top of the slit in her dress, allowing the dress to be removed or put on that way.

The top of the zipper split into the straps that held the whole thing up, winding around her neck to drape down her back, only to come together again, just above the base of her spine, where the black material appeared again to cover her bum modestly.

Fully dressed, she slipped on her heels and took a final look in the mirror. She gave herself not only a look over to make sure she was dressed right for a party at Malfoy Manor, but also one last chance to change her mind.

Decision made and looking perfect, she pulled her wand and apparated to the gates of the Manor. She took a deep breath as she made her way up the long and lighted path toward the house. The huge home was lit up brighter than she'd ever seen before, and already there were a few people being greeted at the door by a small elf.

Swallowing down her nervousness, she took the last few steps and smiled at the elf that bid her welcome to Malfoy Manor. Her heels clicked on the marble floors as she stepped inside and followed the few people in front of her, not closely, but sedately, keeping a decent distance between them.

With a small glance behind her, she saw that she was the last in the group of arrivals to join the party. Slowing her steps even more, she watched the people head inside the festive room, but paused and didn't follow.

This is insane, she thought again. _I'm going to get caught. They're going to know why I'm here._ Panic starting to seep into her, before logic kicked in. _Wait, I can attend a party and not have any nefarious plans along with it. I was invited, so it's not like I'm crashing the party. Just stay calm and if you get the hair, then wonderful. If not, then no one will ever know the real reason why you showed up to begin with. _

"Are you planning on going in, or just watching the party from here?" A silky and smooth voice asked from behind her.

Turning quickly, Hermione swallowed nervously as she came face to face with the one and only Lucius Malfoy. She saw his eyes slip down over her frame, taking in her dress, or at least she thought that was what he was looking at. Taking in how good he looked in his hand tailored, black dress robes as well, she hoped she didn't let the drool pooling in her mouth run down her chin.

When his eyes met hers again, his brow rose. "Cat got your tongue?" he asked, lips curving ever so slightly.

Mentally shaking herself from her stupor and swallowing the excess saliva, Hermione gave him a small smile. "Sorry, you startled me. I was simply wondering if Ginny would strangle me tomorrow or wait until next week to do it if I did end up escaping and not joining in her party." It was a complete lie, but one that came out smoothly.

His brow rose a bit more at that. "Her party?"

Hermione shrugged lightly, forcing her gaze to stay on his face and not to slip down to look him over a second time, like he did almost nonchalantly to her. "While you might be hosting tonight's events, I can assure you that she's got it in her head that this is her party that everyone is attending. Which means she has had her hand in every aspect of it. Décor, catering, music, all of it. To the point of...taking over in some ways. Am I right?"

His lips curved even more. "You are, though I'm curious how you know this. Did she tell you?"

Hermione laughed softly. "No, I've just met her mother. Ginny is certainly Molly Weasley's daughter in that regard." She was keeping to her lie easily, though she wasn't fully sure how she managed it.

He hummed softly as his head tilted slightly as he considered her. "So tell me, my dear, why go to all the trouble of dressing up and looking so very lovely, if you're going to run off when you're only a few steps away from the festivities?"

Hermione laughed again, just as softly as the first time, though her mind was somewhat stunned that he said she looked lovely. _Very lovely, in fact._ "I never said I wasn't going to join the party. I had every intention of going in**;** I just thought I'd take a moment to find amusement in her potential reaction had I not shown up tonight."

He chuckled softly. "In answer to that, I doubt you'd get but a day or two of respite before she did indeed...strangle you, as you put it. She's been asking the elves for the last hour if you'd shown up yet."

Her brow knitted, not sure why her appearance was so important. "She has? Hmm... I guess I should stop dawdling and go inside then."

He held out his arm for her and smiled at her curious look. "It would be rather impolite to not escort my daughter-in-law's friend inside after seeing that she didn't have anyone to lead her in already."

Hermione nodded, already wondering if she dared try to snag a golden strand of his just yet. It would be obvious this way, so she refrained for now and instead simply took his arm. "Thank you, Mr. Malfoy."

He started to lead her inside. "Lucius, please. With as often as you've visited Ginerva here, it seems silly to keep such formalities. Don't you think?"

Hermione felt her pulse fluttering at that. "It would be silly. So I guess that means you'll have to call me Hermione in return."

His eyes met hers, intense as always, but still unreadable as usual. "I suppose it does, my dear."

He led her inside without another word, pausing to speak with a few people here and there, though he never tried to remove her hand from his arm. He introduced Hermione to them all, giving them a small smile before he excused himself and Hermione from those still seeking his attention.

"If you've guests to see to, I can find Ginny on my own." She said softly after the third person had stopped him along the way.

"Hermione, I am seeing to my guests. You are a guest, are you not?" At her nod, he smirked. "See? I am seeing to you, so I am not neglecting my duties." His smirk growing as he they moved through the crowded ballroom.

A new group calling out to Lucius saved her from having to respond, though she had no clue what she might have said. Hermione thought the man speaking to them was rather pompous as she listened as well, but Lucius stayed gracious, giving him his full attention.

Lucius shifted slightly out of her grasp, moving his hand to rest on the middle of her back instead as he continued to listen to the man. Not seeming to pause in his attentions at all while he did so.

Hermione forced her face to remain neutral, though she was very aware of his hand touching her bare skin now. The narrow straps that crossed at her back didn't offer much cover from his warm flesh touching her, not that she really wanted anything to block his touch, but it was slightly distracting and it took more focus to pay attention to the gentleman speaking.

Within minutes, the gentleman who was currently speaking, had her bored to tears and it took everything in her remaining power to keep her eyes from glazing over. Her eyes quickly scanned the crowd for a familiar face so that she could attempt to excuse herself before he put her to sleep.

"Oh, how rude of me." Lucius said suddenly, interrupting the man mid-word as he glanced at Hermione, who looked up at him with a mild frown at his sudden words. "I didn't even get you a drink yet, my dear. That is completely unforgivable of me. If you'll excuse us, Reginald, I really should see to correcting my error."

"Oh, yes. We'll continue this later, Lucius. Miss Granger, it was a pleasure to meet you." The pompous wizard said, holding out his hand for hers.

Not wanting to seem rude, Hermione met his hand, but instead of shaking it, he brought it to his lips to give it a kiss. It took everything in her not to curl her lip in displeasure and jerk her hand away, or wipe the excess moisture away when he did finally release her. "Likewise," she said politely.

She heard Lucius chuckle again after they moved away, his hand still at her back. "I'm sorry, my dear. I couldn't seem to find a way out of that dreadful conversation any sooner without seeming rude. Do you need my handkerchief for your hand, or did he manage to not slobber on it too badly?"

Hermione's lips twitched. "It**'**s fine. Nothing a good**,** thick towel couldn't mop up. So I need a drink, hmm?"

"That you do, and I'd hate to be remiss in my hosting duties." He told her, already moving her towards the full stocked bar with his hand still on her back, where he had someone staffed to keep the drinks flowing smoothly. He could have caught the eye of a passing waiter, but chose not to.

When they reached the bar, he turned to look at her. "What exactly would you like this evening, Hermione?"

Hermione felt her breath almost hitch in her throat at his question. She could have answered it so many different ways, but knowing that he hadn't meant it as it sounded, she smiled softly. "White wine, please."

Lucius leaned in and spoke quietly in the ear of the man behind the bar. With a quick nod, the bartender moved away out of sight. It wasn't long before he was back with glasses of wine and handed them to Lucius directly, who in turn gave one to Hermione.

"Here we are, my dear. What shall we toast to?" He asked her softly as he looked at her.

Hermione paused before her lips curved. "How about to all of us getting what we want for Christmas?" She was hoping she did get what she wanted, at least one of his platinum blond hairs.

He nodded and clinked his glass with hers, both taking a sip of their wine. Hermione smiled as the flavor hit her tongue and eased its way down. "This is delicious," she said softly.

He smiled in return. "I'm glad you like it. It's from my private stocks."

"Oh? I thought they were serving wine that the company you hired brought with them." She said.

His smile grew. "They are, but this is from my private stocks. Only a select few are served from these bottles I had brought out."

Hermione found herself curious as to why he'd give her a glass from his private stocks, but again was saved from answering as Ginny spotted her and came over towards them. The redheads silver dress clung to her frame in a very pretty way.

"Hermione, I've been looking everywhere for you," Ginny said, a smile on her lips. "When did you get here?" She moved in to hug her friend.

Hermione smiled and returned the hug before pulling back again. "Not long ago. Mr..." she started but paused at the raised brow that Lucius sent her way. "Er... Lucius was kind enough to escort me inside and make sure I had a drink in hand."

Ginny looked over at Lucius, a hint of amusement in her eyes. "She was trying to escape, wasn't she?"

Lucius smirked. "No, she was just admiring the Christmas decorations you had arranged so beautifully, when I came upon her."

Hermione gave him a small smile at that, but Ginny went on speaking. "Well, now that you're here, there is someone you I want you to meet." Shifting her gaze her to Lucius, she took Hermione's free hand as a smile curved the redhead's lips. "Please excuse us, Lucius."

Hermione frowned at Ginny, but before she could say a word, Ginny was tugging her away from Lucius. Hermione sent a quick glance at the man and saw him watching her being pulled away, but his face was closed off to his thoughts.

Ginny all but dragged her towards Draco, who was talking to a young man around their age. Draco turned when he saw his wife approaching them. Draco looked Hermione up and down and smirked at her. "My, my, Granger. I didn't know you could clean up so nicely. I don't think I've ever seen you look so...dare I say, somewhat pretty?"

Hermione's eyes narrowed at him. "I still wouldn't dare to use that term with me, Draco. Might find my wand shoved somewhere uncomfortable for you."

Draco's smirk grew, but as he opened his mouth to say more, Ginny nudged him with her elbow. "Now, Draco, be nice. I think Hermione looks gorgeous."

Whoever the young man was gave Hermione an appraising look and smiled at her. "I'd have to agree with your wife, Draco. Your friend here is certainly stunning."

Hermione gave him a polite smile, not sure that she liked how he was looking at her, but Ginny jumped in before she could respond. "Hermione, this is Lyle Prescott. He works with Draco at Gringotts. Lyle, this is my very dear friend, Hermione Granger."

Hermione looked at Ginny, suspicion starting to form in her eyes, before returning her gaze to Lyle. She held out her hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Prescott."

Lyle gave her a charming smile, his dark blue eyes roaming over her face. "Please, call me Lyle." He took her hand and placing a kiss on the top of it.

Hermione smiled politely again, taking him in. He was taller than her, but not quite six feet tall, black hair slicked back neatly like Draco's was, and he had an average build. He was handsome, but she wasn't really interested.

"We were telling Lyle here about your work at the Ministry. How that by working in the Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, you tend to get very wrapped up in your work and don't always have a lot of free time." Ginny said.

Hermione's suspicions grew at Ginny's statement. _Oh, I know you didn't invite me here tonight to set me up with one of Draco's cronies,_ she thought, already planning on giving Ginny a hex or two later if her assumptions were correct.

However, she kept her polite smile in place. "Yes, well, it takes time to help change some of the laws that are more harmful than helpful to many magical creatures. Werewolves, for example, are still shunned, and it's hard for them to find work at times. Not to mention that centaurs are constantly denied service if they try to go into wizarding shops at all. Even St. Mungo's has been known to make the centaurs wait longer than anyone else before they're treated."

Draco chuckled softly. "Always trying to save everyone, Granger."

Hermione's eyes sparked, but Lyle spoke up. "I think it's admirable what you're doing, Hermione. Someone needs to look out for those that are looked down upon simply for being what they are. I just hope they know and appreciate all the hard work it sounds like you put in for their benefit."

Hermione looked at Lyle. She hadn't given him permission to use her forename, but she appreciated his words. "Thank you," she said softly.

Lyle smiled at her. "My pleasure. Can I interest you in a dance, Hermione?" He held out his hand.

Hermione opened her mouth to decline, but Ginny pushed Hermione forward. "She'd love to," the redhead said, smirking at Hermione when she glared mildly at Ginny.

Lyle led her to the dance floor that was already full of couples swaying to music. Hermione fought a sigh of annoyance as Lyle led her into the familiar steps. His movements were graceful, but she was still upset at Ginny for doing this to her.

She was unaware of the silver eyes watching her as she danced, eyes that had seen Ginny all but push her forward when it was obvious that she didn't want to dance with the young man. Those same eyes took in the way the young man was holding her, hands not placed inappropriately, but they still holding Hermione closer than they should, considering they'd apparently just met.

Hermione stayed silent, so Lyle filled in the lack of conversation for her. "So Draco tells me that you're not seeing anyone right now."

Hermione rolled her eyes, sure that he couldn't see her do it anyway. "No, I'm not." Brian didn't count; they weren't actually dating or anything. Just...taking care of each other's itches.

Lyle smiled. "I find it hard to believe that a girl as pretty as yourself isn't bombarded by blokes trying to take you out every night of the week."

Hermione bit her lip to keep a fresh sigh of annoyance at bay. She hated being set up with strangers. "Yes, well, as Ginny said, I've been rather busy with work."

He sent her out into a slow spin before bringing her back. "I think we need to correct that. I'd love to take you to dinner some night soon."

"I don't know**,**" Hermione said. "I really am rather busy these days. The free time I have is usually spent catching up with my friends that I don't see that often."

Lyle smiled, pulling her a small bit closer. "I understand, but you should let me take you out. A girl as lovely as yourself surely has needs."

Hermione frowned, before she understood what he meant and her eyes grew wide. "I'm sorry?"

Lyle smirked. "No need to be coy. Draco told me that its been a while since you've had a bloke and I know that all women need relief occasionally. I think we could have some fun, don't you?"

Hermione's eyes were narrowed now, teeth gritted together. Catching a peek at Draco across the room, she seethed even more when he smirked at her. "I'm not sure what exactly Draco has told you about me, but I don't...sleep with a guy I don't even know." She tried to ease away from him, but he held her firmly in his arms. She couldn't escape without causing a scene.

She heard him chuckle as he pulled her closer, seemingly unaware of her trying to escape him. "So we should get to know each other. We both have things taking up a large portion of our time, but I'm willing to take a few days to get to know each other first before we satisfy both of our needs. We could have quite a lovely arrangement that suits us both when the need arises."

Hermione had enough of his rude insinuations and was ready to say to hell with not making a scene. Already she was thinking that she was going to hex the utter hell out of both Ginny and Draco, but before she could say or do anything**,** a hand touched Lyle's shoulder.

"Excuse me," a silky voice said. "But I believe, Hermione, that you promised your first dance of the night with me."

Hermione turned her head and found Lucius Malfoy standing a few steps away. She almost sighed in relief, but was able to keep it from slipping out. "I did, didn't I? I'm terribly sorry, but you can have this one and the next to make up for it." She moved away from Lyle instantly. "Excuse me, Lyle."

Lucius gave Lyle an appraising look before taking Hermione's hand and eased her into what was left of the dance. Lyle was frowning as he walked away, and Hermione did let her sigh escape this time. "Thank you," she said, her hand on his shoulder.

Lucius smirked softly. "You're welcome. I've no idea what he was saying, but your discomfort was becoming more and more obvious the longer you danced with him. I figured I would be remiss in my duties if I didn't save you from a horrible dance partner."

Hermione swallowed. "It wasn't his dancing that was the problem." Her gaze landing on Draco, who was frowning at her now dancing with Lucius, seeming slightly confused as to why she wasn't dancing with Lyle...and why his father would step in at all. It only spiked her temper more. Ginny on the other hand, looked even more amused than before, which didn't help her anger a single bit either.

"So what was the problem, then?" Lucius asked her.

"I don't like being propositioned by virtual strangers, no matter who thought it might be fun to introduce us," Hermione said, a touch of anger in her voice.

Lucius' brows rose at hearing that. "Draco sent you off to dance with a young man you didn't know that only intended to try and get you into his bed?" If so, he might have to say a few words to his son later about it.

Hermione breathed deeply. "I'm not sure what exactly Draco said to him, or what Ginny was thinking in pushing me towards the prat, but I doubt they knew exactly what he intended to say to me. If they did...you may find yourself short a son and daughter-in-law soon."

Lucius' lips curved. "Oh?"

Hermione nodded. "Yes, because if they did know what the arse was planning on offering, I will be murdering them both. Slowly and painfully, too."

Lucius chuckled as he sent her out a slow and graceful spin, pulling her back against him as he transitioned back into the smooth steps easily. "I don't blame you for being angry, my dear. I think I would be upset as well at such a thing. I'm curious, though. Had he not been so...ill-mannered in his proposition, would you have continued on with my son and daughter-in-law's apparent plan?"

Hermione frowned. "You mean would I have gone out with him? I don't know. I doubt it, though."

Lucius hummed softly. "I think they only made the introductions since you haven't had any...male company in quite some time."

Hermione's frown grew. "How would you know what company I'm keeping these days?" She was curious now.

Lucius shrugged lightly. "Neither Draco, nor Ginerva, realize how far their voices carry when they're walking down a hallway and speaking to one another."

Hermione sighed again. "Wonderful. It's nice to know my friend and her annoying husband are gossiping about my sex life."

"From the sounds of it, there isn't much of a life to gossip about," he pointed out.

Hermione smirked. "Just because I do not flaunt my personal life, doesn't mean there isn't one that I'm not enjoying."

Lucius regarded the young woman in his arms with something like amusement. "So you are seeing someone. Why keep it a secret, then?"

Hermione laughed softly. "If I tell you, it wouldn't be much of a secret, now would it?"

Lucius chuckled. "There is that, I suppose. However, I'm curious as to who has caught the infamous Hermione Granger's eye, and why that wizard would be a secret from her friends."

_Because the wizard that has caught my eye, isn't the one I'm seeing. Or shagging, rather. We don't date, that's for damn sure_, she thought to herself, but she knew she'd never repeat that out loud. "I like keeping my secrets to myself, is all. Otherwise, they wouldn't stay a secret for long."

"Hmm," he said as the dance ended, but he didn't release her. Instead, he simply led her into a new one. "That still doesn't answer the question, my dear. Why keep your wizard a secret at all?"

Hermione debated her answer, knowing what she was thinking of saying could be seen as her playing with fire. "Maybe I've not made the person aware of my interest and don't wish him to find out simply because people gossip while not aware of who all is around to overhear it."

Lucius' brow quirked at that. "If you're worried about him overhearing anything, then logic dictates that it's someone that your friends know. Interesting."

Hermione laughed softly even as she realized that he was smarter than she gave him credit for. "I didn't say that either. I meant that they're not always aware of their surroundings when they speak openly about things. Do you have any idea how many articles have been published about Harry's private life because Ron said something in public that was overheard by a reporter for the Daily Prophet?"

Lucius hummed before speaking again. "May I ask why you've not made your interest known? You've certainly never lacked courage before, from what I've seen."

Hermione didn't know how to answer that without giving herself away. She couldn't very well say that it was because he's almost twice her age, or that it was her friend's father or father-in-law. She didn't really consider Draco much of a friend, though he was more so than he ever had been prior to him marrying Ginny. Nor could she say that the thought of saying anything to him terrified her beyond belief.

When she didn't answer, Lucius' intrigue grew more. "Do you not have an answer to that, or do you just not want to share your answer with me?"

Hermione frowned slightly. "It's complicated," she finally said in a soft voice.

Lucius chuckled. "My dear, things of that nature usually are."

They finished their dance, and as Lucius went to lead her off the dance floor, a couple, not paying attention, stumbled into Hermione. Knocked off balance, her ankle twisted in her high heel, but Lucius caught her before she fell.

The couple quickly apologized and asked if she was alright, and Hermione nodded, but that was all she could manage. Her arm slid around Lucius' shoulder and neck as he shifted her to fully stand again, and she felt his hair brushing her fingertips. Her eyes widened slightly when she felt the silky strands. She'd almost forgotten her reason for being here tonight.

Being as discrete as possible, she curled her fingers and felt a strand wrap around her finger lightly. Praying it worked as she got her feet steady under her again, she let her hand pull away as she eased back from the blond man that had caught her and felt the strand come with her.

Keeping her face as blank as possible, she quickly dropped her arm, trying to close her hand around the hair she'd snagged. Her heart beating wildly in her chest at what had happened. _Oh, god, I got it! I got a hair!_ Her brain was all but screaming at her.

"Thank you." She said to Lucius after the couple had moved on. "For catching me." Giving him a smile and praying it didn't look shaky, though it did feel that way to her.

Lucius frowned slightly at her. "You're welcome, my dear, but are you sure you're alright?" Taking note of the unsure smile.

Hermione nodded quickly. "Yes, I'm fine."

He nodded and went to take her hand to finish leading her off the floor. Only, he grabbed her closed fist instead of the empty one, and she quickly moved it away from him, afraid she'd either lose the hair or that he'd feel it.

But her pulling away had him raising a brow at her. "Are you sure you're alright?"

She nodded again. "Oh...yes."

His eyes searched hers and saw both panic and excitement in them, but didn't understand why he saw either one. His eyes dropped to her closed fist and he quickly figured out that there was something in her hand that she didn't want to let go of, nor did she want anyone knowing about it, if the look in her eyes said anything.

Not wanting to make a scene, and wanting to know what the hell was suddenly in her hand, he gave her a smile. "Good. Let's go get a drink, my dear."

"Well..." she started.

But he cut her off. "I insist. In fact, why don't we go into my office so we can make sure your ankle is alright."

Hermione swallowed nervously, confirming that something was up, and he didn't give her a chance to say anything before he quickly led her out of the room, not even stopping when people called out to him.

_What is she holding that is so important? _he wondered as he moved towards his office. _When did she get it, anyway? _

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_**A/N:** More coming soon. Hope you all liked that. Anyone interested in seeing what inspired her dress go to : _www . elegantmart _. com/Fashion/FrontZip-Black-Evening-Dress__ 15451 . aspx

_Take care Everyone and Merry Christmas to you all. Please leave me your thoughts. _

_Also, I did create a banner for this story and its on my profile.  
_


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: ** Hello everyone. Thank you so much for the wonderful reviews, I loved them all. Here is chapter two, I had hoped to get it up sooner, but, sadly was busy. Here it is now though. Hope you all enjoy it. Take care and Happy Holidays.  
_

**_Special Thanks to DirtyThings for fixing my errors and making this sound so much better, and doing it quickly too. You are awesome, sweetie, and I really appreciate it._**

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**Chapter 2  
**

Hermione was panicking as they left the ballroom and headed down the long hallway. With him right beside her, she couldn't do anything to hide the hair anywhere. If she tried to pull out her wand to do any kind of magic to hide it, he'd ask what the hell she was doing. But she was afraid he'd eventually ask why her hand was closed.

Forced to do nothing, she walked with him, though that didn't stop her from trying to reassure him that she was fine so that she could attempt to escape to the loo for a moment.

"Lucius, if I'm walking, then my ankle is fine," she tried as he led her with his hand at her back.

He spared her a brief glance. "Better safe than sorry, my dear." _You're not getting out of this either_, he thought. _I want to know what the hell is in your hand. _

Hermione gave him another smile. "True, but I really am fine."

"Then, you won't mind me just making sure. Ginerva would never forgive me if I didn't see to you after seeing your ankle twist like it did, now would she?" He asked, turning down a new hallway, still heading to his office.

"Okay, but first do you think..." she started to ask.

Lucius cut her off. "No."

Before she could say another word, they reached his office and he opened the door. Ushering her inside and closing the door, he quickly lifted her wrist with the closed hand. "What are you hiding in your hand, my dear?" His grip on her wrist firm, but not bruising.

Hermione's eyes grew wide at that. _ Crap. I thought he just wanted to see my ankle._ "Pardon?"

His eyes on hers, his brow rose. "Do not play games with me, Hermione. What is in your hand? You didn't have anything while we danced, so what do you have now?"

He saw the wheels turning in her mind, saw she was trying to think of something, anything to keep her from having to open her closed fist. But he saw too the moment she realized that she didn't have a way to get out of it.

Her lips tightened slightly before she sighed and opened her hand. He didn't see anything at first and was utterly confused, until she shifted a tiny bit and the light glinted off of something. Something that had his brows shooting into his hairline.

His eyes jerking to hers, narrowing slightly, while all sorts of speculation went thought his mind instantly. There was only one reason to want someone's hair, and he was furious at her for it. He'd never had a moment of doubt on whether or not she was trustworthy before, but now... "What exactly did you plan on doing with that, my dear?" So many thoughts of what she could do while looking like him filled him, pissing him off even more.

Hermione saw the anger in his eyes and couldn't bring herself to tell him. She knew she was going to get caught one day, and now she had. It was stupid for her to even think about taking a hair from Lucius Malfoy, but to actually do it was even stupider. She had no clue as to why she'd thought he wouldn't notice or somehow catch her.

When she didn't speak, his anger roared inside him at her not only daring to take a hair from him in order to become him, but for not even having the respect of answering him. So much so, that he decided it was time she learned something that very few really did about him. He let go of her wrist and grasped her chin so that she couldn't look anywhere but at him.

"Legilimens," he growled, seeing her eyes widen even more in a split second of shock and recognition before images flooded his mind and blocked him from seeing her eyes any longer.

He saw her stirring a cauldron in her home, the lights of her Christmas tree twinkling in the background as he saw exactly what was inside. _Polyjuice potion_, his mind said. It didn't help his anger knowing that she did have what she needed to use his hair for whatever plan that she had.

That one disappeared and another image filled his mind. He saw her wandering about a room, saw her pick up some man's shirt as she smelled it, saw her run her hands across a brush and that black hairs tangled in her fingers as she stared at it. Saw a stunned look register on her face, and then the image was gone. It confused him.

_What had shocked her? _ He wondered, but then a new image formed. One that stunned the utter hell out of him.

He saw her naked and riding Sirius Black, her beautiful body bouncing quickly as she cried out her pleasure, her face showing her complete bliss. It had his lips parting in shock at seeing not only her naked form, but how beautiful she looked in the midst of her passionate release.

_When the hell did she start sleeping with Black? _ He wondered as he sifted through her mind more, looking for the reason she wanted his hair, though now part of him wanted to know how she ended up in Black's bed at all.

_Is that who her secret is about? That she's sleeping with Sirius Black? If so, I can see why she's hiding it. That wouldn't go over well with Potter at all. _ He thought as he saw another memory come forward, and it had his own astonishment growing again.

It was himself, swimming as she spoke with Ginny. He watched her gaze at himself in the pool, her surprise showing in her eyes, before her eyes raked over his half-naked form while he stood up in the shallow water. The staggering look on her face as she watched him quickly changing into...

_Bloody hell, it's lust that's on her face_, he realized. _The little chit wants me, but...why is she shagging Black if she wants me? What does she want my hair for?_ He couldn't even contemplate her real reason for a moment, as it was so out in left field that the idea never crossed his mind at all.

But as that image melted away, a new one surfaced.

_**Hermione was sitting on her sofa when a knock sounded at her door. She quickly got up and opened it, smiling at the young man on the other side. "Hi, Brian. What brings you by?" she asked, letting him in and shutting her door. **_

_**Brian smirked at her. "Like you have to ask," he said before moving in and snogging her. **_

_What the hell? How many people is she sleeping with? _ he wondered as that image fell away, but he felt Hermione trying to resist, trying to force him from her mind. _ Oh, I think not, my dear,_ he thought, pressing harder inside her mind_. Not until I see all that I need to see. _

A new image came flying at him, one he had to dig for with how hard she was fighting him to keep him from seeing it. With how hard she was fighting, it only had him thinking he really wanted to see it.

"_**I don't know what she's sees in him. Why can't she look at me like that?" Brian asked as they stood, making dinner together in her kitchen. **_

_**Hermione shrugged as she added a bit of fresh herbs to the small pot she was stirring. "I don't know what you tell you, Brian." **_

_**Brian paused, hands fiddling absentmindedly with what he'd been chopping. "Don't get me wrong, Hermione. I like what we have. It's just..." **_

_**Hermione smirked. "Brian, I know what we have. It's not real, and you want something real. So do I, one day." There was a flicker of something in her eyes when she said that. **_

_**Brian sighed in relief, not looking at her as he resumed his chopping duties. "See, most girls would be offended at listening to the guy they were shagging whine about the girl they really want." **_

_**Hermione laughed softly. "I'm not most girls. You think I don't want someone else too?" She sighed. "Trust me, I wish I could stop wanting him, too. It's ridiculous! He's twice my age and...he's my best friend's godfather. The sad part is...I don't think I'd want him once I had him. I think it's all physical anyway." **_

_**Brian frowned at her. "So why not see if the bloke would shag you until you are over the physical part? You know I wouldn't mind. We're not...you know, exclusive or anything. It's not like you're not pretty enough to catch some guy's eye. Or is it that you're not his type?" **_

_**Hermione sighed again, looking away from him. "I don't know. He's flirts, he always has, but...he doesn't look at me like that and I know he never will. The flirting is just who he is; it's not because he wants me like that." **_

_**Brian lifted his hand and rubbed her back gently. "I'm sorry, love. I wish there was a way for us both to get what we want." **_

_**Hermione paused in stirring the sauce she was making, her head tilting as she looked at Brian. "Do you?" **_

_**Brian nodded. "Of course. Why wouldn't I?" **_

_**Hermione pondered her next words before she spoke again. "What if I told you that it was possible?" **_

_**Brian smirked at her. "Then, I'd say you were mad." **_

_**Hermione laughed softly. "I think I might agree with you on that. But I'm serious. What if you could have her and I could have...him." **_

_**Brian frowned in confusion. "How?" **_

_**Hermione swallowed, pausing to ponder her words again. "Polyjuice potion." **_

_**Brian looked stunned at hearing that. "You mean, assuming we could get our hands on any." **_

_**Hermione smirked. "Would you, though? If I could get us some, would you want to try it?" **_

_**Brian thought about that for several moments. "I don't want to watch some bloke shag Cindy. I want to do it, you know, as...me." **_

_**Hermione nodded. "We could do it different times. You take it one night for me, and I'd take it another night for you. We'd swap out who was who; that way it wasn't weird." **_

_**Brian chuckled. "'Cause the idea isn't weird enough on its own? Besides, how would we get the potion? You can't just go downtown and buy it." **_

_**Hermione set her spoon down and faced him. "I can brew it. I've been able to do it perfectly since my second year at Hogwarts. So what do you say?" **_

The image faded before he heard the young man's answer, and Lucius was more stunned than he ever remembered being before. In that moment of complete shock at what the hair she held implied, Hermione kicked him out of her mind at last.

She was panting at the force it took for her to do so and she jerked out of his grasp, but before she could escape his office, Lucius waved his hand and warded the door, trapping her inside.

Hermione's hand flew from the handle and she spun back to face him. "Let me go."

His thoughts flying about his mind, Lucius studied her. "So this is your secret? This is what you can't tell your friends about? Exactly how many people have you been stealing hairs from so that you could sleep with them?"

Hermione breathed deeply, her teeth clenched. "It's...it's not like that."

His brow rose. "No? Funny, that isn't what it looks like with not only your memories, but with my hair that is still in your hand. Here I thought you had other reasons for wanting it, but I find the real reason much more intriguing."

Her jaw clenched more at that. "I haven't been going about Britain just taking everyone's hair." She was insulted, even though she knew she was the one in the wrong.

He contemplated her a moment, before moving away to pour them both a drink. Hermione frowned at him, walking away, but when she tried the door again, her hand flew away a second time. She wasn't really surprised that it did.

"You might as well take a seat, my dear. You're not going anywhere until I learn exactly what you've been up to," he told her, not having seen her try to leave again with his back to her, but not needing to.

Hermione huffed out a breath, but didn't move away from the door. He turned back to her, two tumblers with Ogden's Finest glinting in his hands. Seeing her standing in the same spot, his lips curved slightly.

Walking towards her, he spoke. "Stand if you must, but I mean it: you're not leaving until I know it all, Hermione." He held the drink out to her, and it took her a moment to lift her hand and take it from him.

"Cheers," he said, before taking a sip. Hermione frowned at him not raising her glass at all, but he gave her a smirk after he'd swallowed the burning amber liquid down. "I can wait all night for you to tell me, if I must."

When she still didn't speak, he sighed and walked to his sofa, taking a seat so he could wait her out. It went against everything he'd been raised with to sit while a lady stood, but he was proving a point. He wouldn't be giving in.

Several minutes passed in silence before Hermione huffed out another breath and went to sit as well. "Fine, but when I'm done, you're going to remove the wards and let me leave. Agreed?" Her legs crossed as she sat, unaware of the slit in her dress rising over her thigh.

He studied her again, taking in the expanse of her leg that she didn't seem aware of, and gave a small shrug. "Agreed." He knew that depending on exactly what she said, he might just change his mind.

Hermione took a long drink, gasping at the burn after she swallowed and coughed a small bit at the harshness of it going down and all but exploding into flames in her stomach. She didn't drink anything like this normally. "Good lord, that's awful," she choked out when she could finally breath again.

His lips twitched, curving a tiny bit before he called out for one of his elves. When it appeared in front of him, he asked for a glass of the white wine that he'd given her earlier. It surprised her that he'd do so, considering he was not happy with her at the moment. The elf was only gone a few moments before it was back with her drink. It handed it to her and took the unwanted tumbler from her before popping out again.

"Now your story, my dear," Lucius said, still amused at her eyes, still watering slightly from the Ogden's. He supposed he should have asked if she'd rather something else before handing it to her, but gave a mental shrug at the lapse in proper manners.

Hermione sighed before starting her tale, explaining how she'd been staying at Grimmauld Place when the idea first hit her, about the crush she'd had since she met the dashing Marauder again at the tender age of fourteen, and how she knew it was impossible, but that she wasn't able to fully get over it. She felt incredibly stupid while telling him, but did so anyway.

She told him how Sirius was the only person that she'd ever used the potion to be with before and his brows quirked slightly at hearing that. He'd almost expected something much worse than what he was hearing. She didn't go into detail about how many hairs she'd used that belonged to Sirius, just that it had been more than once, and only until her crush was gone.

What surprised him the most out of everything she told him, was the guilt that she said she had after she'd done it. The guilt that came back after each encounter, since she knew that what she was doing was wrong, the same guilt that he could see a small hint of, even as she spoke. She hadn't liked that she was taking advantage of Sirius or his trust in her to be alone in his house.

But as he listened to her talk more, he started to understand why she did it, knowing that lust could be a very powerful emotion. It could be very uncontrollable at times too, making people do things they'd never normally do, and it could drive a person to insanity if it became too much. From what he'd understood, she'd harbored her crush for over a decade and it had still lingered due to her curiosity more than anything. What she did eased the curiosity and ended the crush.

"Tell me," he finally said when she stopped speaking, "How do I fit into all of this?"

Hermione closed her eyes and the first blush since getting caught started to fill her cheeks. "Can we not go into that, please. You... you already saw my memory on how that started. Isn't that enough without me having to say it, too?"

Lucius couldn't stop his smirk. "No, it isn't enough. I said already once before that I've never seen you lacking in confidence and courage, so tell me."

Hermione's eyes opened and she sighed. "Alright," she said, knowing he'd never let her leave otherwise. "I'm attracted to you, and...have been for a while now. Satisfied?"

"No. Why not just tell me?" he asked, truly curious.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Because, first off, you are Draco's father and my best friend's father-in-law. That automatically makes you off limits."

His brow rose. "According to whose rules, exactly?"

"Everyone's. Everyone knows that you do not touch your friend's family members, not like that, anyway. While Draco isn't exactly my best friend, he is friendlier than he used to be with me, and that..." Hermione sighed. "That means I cannot do anything with you."

Lucius' head tilted curiously. "You said 'first off', so does that mean there is another reason?" He deciding to move on from that for now, though he fully intended to point out that she'd briefly dated Ginny's brother, which went against that rule.

Hermione shrugged. "I...you..." She sighed again, embarrassed to be saying any of this, but more so with what she was about to admit. "You are intimidating as hell, do you know that?"

He chuckled. "I did, actually. Is that all? You didn't say anything because I intimidate you?"

Hermione glared. "No, but that didn't help matters. Look...I didn't think you'd be interested and I didn't feel like being humiliated, alright?"

Lucius regarded the woman beside him curiously. "Do you really think I would purposely humiliate you?"

Hermione considered that a moment before answering. "While you might not do so on purpose, even being rejected kindly can be humiliating. Have you ever been rejected in your life? Do you have any clue what it is like to grab onto every ounce of courage you have, only to be told patronizingly, even if that isn't the intent, that you're not wanted like that? To have your hopes and desires thrown back at you like they mean nothing?"

"No, but you obviously have," he said, even more curious now. "Tell me, who rejected you so badly that you'd rather have a fake relationship with some young man that you apparently don't really want, and who apparently wants someone else, than to try for a real one with someone that you do want?"

Her eyes hardened. "That wasn't in our deal."

"Shall I look for myself?" He asked her, more than willing to do what he had to find out what he wanted to know.

Hermione's eyes sparked in anger. "No, you may not."

"I wasn't asking for permission, I was asking which option you'd rather have, my dear. You've the choice to tell me on your own, or I'll find out for myself," he told her, draining the last of his tumbler and setting it on a table beside him.

Hermione's chin lifted as she stared at him. "What I did prior to what even started this mess isn't relevant. It's none of your business and it's not something I care to share, either."

Lucius' lips pursed a moment as he thought about that. "Actually, I think what happened is very relevant to what started this...mess, as you call it. I think had you not had it happen, you wouldn't be hiding behind someone that you feel safe in only sharing potions with. Someone that you know can't emotionally hurt you, since you're not emotionally invested in each other at all. That is why you settled for a relationship that you yourself admitted wasn't real, with someone that takes care of any physical needs, but that you don't allow to give or take anything else from you."

A whole multitude of emotions crossed her face at his words, rage, denial, and a hint of pain, before more anger settled in place, followed by a look of resignation as she sighed. "It doesn't matter what my reasons are."

It was that look of resignation she gave him that had his own anger coming back. "It does matter."

She glared at him. "Why? How in the world does it matter to you what I do with my life? If I want to have something more, then I'll go find it, and I...I don't want it."

He scoffed at her. "You and I both know you're lying. You said you did want it one day in the memory that I saw."

She shrugged. "Yes, one day. That didn't mean today."

He stood up, refilling his empty glass. "Then, explain the look I saw in your eyes when you said it."

She watched him pour the amber liquid into his glass and take a sip of it. "I've no idea what you're talking about."

He sighed. "I already told you not to play games with me. You know what I'm talking about."

Hermione frowned. "Actually, I don't. I didn't see myself when I was talking. I wasn't looking in a mirror, so I've no idea what you think you saw in my eyes when I said what I did."

Seeing that she really had no idea, he waved her over. "Come here."

Hermione set her untouched wine down and stood before she moved towards him as he walked to his desk. The large credenza behind the desk had several cabinets and, with flick of Lucius' wand, one of the doors opened. A large stone pensieve that had been charmed not to spill a drop of the liquid inside, even if held upside down, came floating over to his desk, landing right in front of both of them.

At her frown, he lifted his wand and held it to his head, pulling out a silvery blue strand, before he dropped it in the bowl. "Take a look for yourself." He said, watching her.

Hermione looked down at the pensieve that had the memory starting to swirl inside it. She wasn't sure she wanted to see what he was talking about. He was so sure about something that had been in her eyes and she didn't know if she really wanted to know what it was. She knew what she'd been thinking at the time, but what had he seen that he felt she should know about?

"What happened to the fiery woman I know that you are? The one that isn't afraid of anything? The one that stood up to a fight a wizard much more powerful than her, simply because of her loyalty and convictions alone?" He asked when she didn't move to look at the memory.

Hermione looked at him. "I... I don't understand what it matters." She really didn't. She didn't understand how they went from him being angry with her for trying to take one of his hairs to him now trying to prove some point about a look in her eyes, and caring about why she chose the life that she did.

Lucius took a deep breath. "Because it does."

Hermione frowned at him. "Why?"

He grabbed her wrist again and held up her hand that still held his hair. "Why did you take this?"

Her frown grew. "You know why."

"Yes, I do. But I want to know why you took it instead of being who I know you are. I want to know why you'd settle for a copy instead of taking what you really want." He told her.

Hermione's frown turned into a look of surprise. "You wanted me to come to you?"

Lucius' jaw clenched. "I want you to take what you want, not settle for mediocrity. A copy is just that. If you want something, truly want something, you shouldn't let anything stand in your way. You never would have before and I want to know who took that from you. Who took your fire, damn you?"

He saw the same flicker in her eyes as before and realized exactly what he was seeing, it was disbelief, it was pain, it was remorse, it was everything that the bastard took from her, and the emptiness he left in its place. All of it rolled together into one tiny flickering light. It was doubt in herself.

Then, it was gone as she closed her eyes. She opened her mouth, but shut it again, breathing deeply before she opened her eyes again. "It doesn't matter."

His eyes blazed with his anger and she explained when she saw it. "I'm not saying it doesn't matter because I don't want to tell you. I'm not saying it because it holds no bearing on the topic at hand. I'm saying his name doesn't matter, because you don't know him anyway. It happened while I was away at university. He was a student I studied with."

Lucius calmed at that, understanding what she meant now with the three words that annoyed the living hell out of him to hear from her. "What happened?"

Hermione took another deep breath. "We were friends and we became lovers."

Lucius frowned. "But you said..."

Hermione gave a morose smile. "There is more than one type of rejection, Lucius."

He nodded, waiting for her to go on. Hermione contemplated her next words a moment. "He was the first...lover I'd ever had, and I apparently thought it was more than it was. I became attached, and he didn't."

His frowned grew. "I doubt it was that simple. Not with the way you've obviously carried on since then."

She gave a bitter laugh. "It was far from simple. You see he had no trouble speaking of his affections. They just weren't heartfelt. He said what he knew I needed to hear to get what he wanted, but he wasn't the only one. You'd think I would be a better judge of character the second time around, but I wasn't. Nor the third, or fourth time. I eventually realized that the emotions involved in taking what I wanted, as you put it, wasn't worth it in the end."

Lucius' jaw clenched again, but she went on. "I found that taking what I needed from someone I couldn't get attached to was much better than dealing with the emotional fall out when things went sour and when the truth of it all came out later. I'd rather go in knowing its all physical, than being lied to in the end."

She pulled her arm free from his grasp. "It was a he that started this, and it was a them that did it. Now you know, and now, I want the wards taken down."

Lucius knew that if he didn't take his wards down that she again would just pawn it off as another man lying to her to get what he wanted. He knew too that if he did what he wanted to do, she'd only push that off as pity at hearing her story. She wasn't ready for him yet, no matter how much he wished that she were.

He'd wanted her for a long time now, and in finding out that she wanted him, he'd thought he'd finally get her. But after everything, he knew that it would only set them further back if he made any kind of move right now.

As much as it annoyed him to do so, he waved his hand and pulled the wards down. "You're free to go, Hermione."

She looked at the hair still in her hand a moment, then set it down on his desk before turning and walking to the door. The action had his brow wrinkling in confusion, not knowing why she'd leave it if she'd wanted it so much. He didn't know if she'd changed her mind on wanting him at all, or if she just didn't want a copy anymore.

But she opened the door and left before he could ask. The sounds of her heels clicking on the marble floor as she walked away had his jaw clenching again.

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_**A/N:** This isn't the end, I promise. Okay, more coming soon. Please leave me your thoughts. Take care all, and Happy Holidays._


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: ** I'm so sorry I didn't post yesterday, was tied up and couldn't find a free moment until now. I will get to rest of everyone's review as soon as I can, I promise. Happy Christmas Eve Everyone. _

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**Chapter 3  
**

The next week passed slowly, and Hermione stared at her Christmas tree once again. Brian had come by twice so far, and each time she'd told him that she wasn't up for company. The first time was just for their usual stress relief with each other. The second time, he'd had one of Cindy's hairs and wanted to play. Both times, she'd sent him away, much to his annoyance and confusion.

When she'd gotten home from the party, she'd looked at the vials of potion she'd bottled of Polyjuice potion. They were carefully lined up on her dining room table, already labeled in her neat and clear handwriting. All she had to do was store them.

Staring at them, she'd felt the first tear trickle down her cheek. The pain and embarrassment of admitting her secret, her shame, had hit her, but it was nothing compared to the pain at remembering just how unwanted she was. She remembered the amused looks in her old lovers eyes at hearing that she cared about them, the insult of finding out that they'd only wanted to play with her, but not keep her. That she was good enough to sleep with, but not to actually have as anything more.

She'd never shared her pain with anyone before. Not even Brian knew the extent of it all. He knew she'd had a bad relationship, but he thought she just really didn't have time or the desire for more than what they had. That she wasn't ready to put the time and effort into a real relationship.

Now Lucius knew. He knew her dark and painful past and knew all about her shame, knew just how undesirable she felt and that she had developed a dirty little secret to get what she wanted just to not have to deal with being hurt again.

Changing into her pajamas, she'd laughed bitterly. She'd wanted Sirius for so long, had wished he'd wake up and smell the roses, as it were. Only even if he had, she doubted she'd have reached out and taken what she wanted. Had he tried to seduce her, after she got over her shock, she'd have probably run away from him. Like she'd run from Lucius as soon as he let her free.

She still wasn't sure if he'd wanted her to come to him, or if he'd just been asking a question. If it went in hand with him wanting to learn why she'd tried to take his hair instead of simply making a pass at him. He'd never looked at her before. At least, she'd never seen him look at her in that way before, so she doubted that he would have really wanted her to come to him. To tell him of her attraction to him, though she didn't believe that he'd have done anything about it had she told him, agonized her.

Tears still streaking down her cheeks at the wound that had reopened with her tale, she wiped them away and forced her memories to be buried again so she could get some sleep. Crawling into bed, she hugged her pillow to her and went to bed.

Going to work each day, she'd get home only to see the vials still on her table. They seemed to taunt her, to remind her not only of her undesirability, but also to remind her of her shame in admitting what she'd done, and what a part of her still wanted.

But it also had her thinking of the anger on Lucius' face as he'd asked who'd stolen her fire, had her remembering the intense look in his eyes as he asked her why she'd settle for mediocrity.

She had settled, she knew she had. It wasn't like her to settle for anything. She never would have before and seeing it happen now pissed her off. It made her sit down after a week of complication and pain-filled thoughts to really shift through it all, sort through the memories of what had happened, and logically put some order to it.

When her failed relationships, though the term made her snort in derision, had happened, she'd been so young. Not that she was old now, but she'd barely been twenty years old, in her first year of university when she met Todd.

They'd studied together for a few months, her noticing how handsome he was, thinking that it would be lovely to have someone like him pay her any mind. Her, the bookworm, the plain Jane that rarely got noticed by anyone, the one that was wanted for her mind, or her ability to do homework, but for nothing else.

Granted, she'd hidden herself behind her books. She hadn't paid much attention to how she dressed beyond comfort. She wore her clothes loose and hiding her frame, no real make-up in place, hair always shoved into a messy bun to keep it out of the way.

It had been Ginny who'd finally made her start putting some kind of effort into her looks and wardrobe. Ginny, who'd come to visit her at school, mostly to tell her about some boy she'd broken up with, and while there, had shaken her head at Hermione's closet full of clothes.

She'd made Hermione take a day to go shopping, the credit card her parents had given her tucked into her purse. She so rarely spent anything outside of what was needed that they didn't mind a small shopping spree. They had actually expected to have bigger bills than they did with the card they'd given her, and seemed almost disappointed when they didn't get them.

Her mother gently told her of her own college days that were filled with girls' nights out, weekend shopping trips with her friends, and parties that she attended. She had boys filling up a good portion of her early tenure, though she didn't go into how far she went with those boys, instead talking of having fun until she met Hermione's father and settled into a relationship with him.

Mostly her mother had hinted at Hermione's having a bit of fun while she was away at school, not necessarily sowing her wild oats, but having the normal college experience, though warning her to be careful while doing so. Hermione had been somewhat shocked to hear all of this from her straight-laced mother, and her mum had smirked at seeing the look on her face before pointing out that she hadn't always been straight-laced. She just grew up, is all.

Hermione had always acted more mature than other kids her age, and was even more so after having lived through the war. She never had any kind of notion or desire to party like a wild girl.

However, with all of that, topped with Ginny taking her to several shops to buy better fitted clothes, Hermione decided to give it a shot. Buying jeans that actually showed off her figure, skirts that showed a bit of leg, shirts that hinted at the figure underneath. Lingerie that was sexy instead of conservative and comfortable, lace replacing cotton.

She also purchased high heels, though those took some time to learn to walk in without falling flat on her face, and boots that gave her an added bit of height with the short heels on them. All of it had transformed Hermione from boring bookworm, to...well, a less boring bookworm. She was still who she was, after all.

Ginny had pulled Hermione into a salon and demanded a more flattering hair cut than the ignored wild mess of curls she already had, ending with still a wild mess of curls, but at least it looked softer and framed her face better.

Ginny then showed her complex make-up charms that seemed like a huge waste of time, but did look good on her. So much so, that when she put it all together, tighter clothes that still had a touch of conservativeness to them, better-looking hair that didn't look a wild rat's nest, and color to her cheeks and lips, the difference was huge.

Her first set of classes after her makeover had several sets of eyes glancing her way, looking like they didn't know who she was. It had Hermione smirking even as her back grew straighter and her head lifted with confidence at the admiring looks here and there.

Her skirt wasn't racy; it was one that came down past her knees, but it showed off her hips and added in with the boots that came up to just under knees so that not a touch of leg was showing. But the blouse had shown her slim waist, and the clinging material had given hints at her rounded breasts. Her hair was up in another messy bun, but with the cut it looked more tousled than messy, and with a light make-up charm in place, she'd been pretty.

When she met up with Todd, his eyes had widened at seeing her and that was when his interest in her changed. Cheeks flushed a bit at the attention, she'd eaten up every drop of praise he'd sent her way as he'd flirted with her, unused to such flattery from boys.

Even when she'd dated Ron, he'd barely complimented her, and if he tried to, he stuttered about and blushed. Their courtship had been brief and barely went beyond second base before they'd ended things, mostly because he annoyed her so much and with her going off to school, she wouldn't be around. He hadn't wanted a long distance relationship anyway. It worked out, in a way, for both of them.

Todd had learned of her innocence and it seemed to get his attention even more. After they dated for about a month, she finally slept with him. She thought he'd loved her; he'd even said as much to her. She thought she loved him in return, which part of her still had, but not as much as she thought she had.

A few months found them shagging more than studying, but she found that Todd was bored and not interested anymore. He'd admitted that it was the awe of having a girl who'd never been with anyone else before that kept him around as long as he'd stayed.

When she'd admitted to having feelings for him, reminding him of his own that he'd sworn he'd had, he'd shrugged it off and said that it must have just been a phase. His vague shrug over it all had cut her deeply, but she'd tried to move on.

When Gabriel had come along, she'd thought herself wiser and more mature, but it ended much the same. They dated, they shagged, and he moved on when he was done, having again shrugged off his claims of having feelings for her as no big deal.

Now her previous wound with Todd, sliced deeper, and was amplified by Gabriel's uncaring attitude, but she'd tried to move on again. Sure, she'd been angry, but she'd been hurt and felt that with her second attempt at relationship only ending much like the first, maybe it wasn't them. Maybe it was her.

Alan had only deepened the still-bleeding wounds, adding to her thoughts that maybe it was her after all. Three boys in a row, all claiming that they cared, all having lied in the end just to get her into bed.

By the time Eric had ditched her, she wasn't surprised to learn he had just wanted to have fun and not get attached. Hermione had been fed up with being lied to and decided that relationships in general were a joke. She didn't know how other girls dealt with it, but she was tired of the games and tired of feeling like crap all the time, even though she didn't feel desirable at all any longer.

That was when she met Brian. Brian had been in the library where she studied and when he looked at her, she'd almost snarled at him to bugger off, still smarting from it all. But he'd left her in peace, not trying to talk to her or get her to go out with him.

As time passed, they became friends, chatting about how difficult their work load was and the classes they were taking. Then came the day that Brian had mentioned that with everything he was doing, he didn't have time to go out and party like everyone else. He didn't have time for girls, though that didn't mean he didn't have needs; he just didn't have the time or energy left over to give a relationship the proper care it would need.

Hermione had listened, intrigued that he was at least honest about it. Keeping her thoughts to herself, she'd talked more with him, joining him in his dorm some nights where they'd study together, quiz each other if exams were coming up.

The night that they ended up sleeping together for the first time, he'd stopped and apologized for starting things, admitting that while, yes, he did want her, it wasn't her that he really wanted, it was more the release of stress he was seeking. He didn't think it fair to lead her on or make her think it was more than it was.

That honesty had Hermione almost tackling him as she snogged the hell out of him. He might not truly desire her, but at least he wouldn't purposely hurt her, and she had needs that needed relieving as well. From there on out, they both knew what they were and were okay with it.

They cared enough about each other not to cause pain, but not enough to really let their shagging go somewhere permanent. He'd come to her, explaining how he finally was going to start dating some witch, and Hermione had wished him well. During that time, they were still friendly to each other and still saw each other, just on a platonic level.

When it ended, Brian asked if she was interested in picking things back up, willing to be her friend either way. Hermione had shrugged and things went back to how they were, with them shagging and sometimes hanging out together if they had time or wanted to be around a friendly face. Otherwise, they didn't see each other.

Sometimes they'd not sleep together for a few months and sometimes they were together every few days. It all depended on time and the needs that arose for either of them.

Now Hermione was frustrated by it all. _I want you to take what you want, not settle for mediocrity. A copy is just that. If you want something, truly want something, you shouldn't let anything stand in your way._ Lucius' words kept reverberating in her mind over and over again.

Finally having had enough, Hermione knew that she needed to do something. The question was, what? She still felt unwanted. Still felt that men only lied to get what they wanted, but now she wondered if maybe that wasn't true. Or maybe, it was more that not all men lied.

An idea popping into her mind, Hermione cringed at what that idea implied. She needed some male point of views and that meant she needed to do some talking to her male friends.

Mind made up, even though she hated what she was about to do, she changed out of her work clothes and floo'd over to Grimmauld Place. Stalking into the kitchen, she found Harry and Remus talking and quickly asked where Ron and Sirius were.

Confused, seeing the odd light in her eyes, Harry went in search of them and brought them into the kitchen. All four men seated, Hermione stood with her hands on her hips as they all shifted about, wondering what they'd done to anger the witch in front of them and all hoping they didn't get hexed too badly.

"I need to ask you all something and...if any of you laugh, you will get a hex to the nether region. Am I understood?" she asked.

Remus frowned at her. "Er...Hermione, before you ask your question, may I ask why you're angry at us?"

Hermione sighed and dropped her stance. "I'm not. I'm angry...at someone else. I feel very stupid on top of it with what I'm about to say and the two together just has me a bit...edgy."

Sirius nodded. "Alright, hit us with your best shot, Kitten."

Ron groaned. "Do you really have to put it that way, mate? She just threatened to hex our dangly bits."

Harry snickered while Sirius and Remus exchanged smirks. Hermione felt her lips twitch as well before she spoke. "Okay, I won't hex your bits and pieces. It just...I need an honest answer and I need this to be taken seriously and not joked about. Fair enough?"

Remus sighed, fighting a fresh smirk. "Hermione, what's this about?"

Hermione took a deep breath, fists clenching against the need to blow this off and run in embarrassment. "I...do you guys..." She growled at her stumbling attempts to get this out. "If I wasn't your friend," she said, earning surprised yet curious frowns all around, "...would you all find me attractive?"

Both Remus' and Sirius' brows shot up to their hairline while Harry looked slightly confused and Ron smirked at her. Ron was the one to speak up first. "Mione, you already know that I do; I was trying to get us to start seeing each other again months ago."

Hermione did her best not to roll her eyes. _Maybe I should have left Ron out of this_, she thought. "Er...right. But why?"

Ron looked unsure of what she meant. "Why what?"

"Why did you want to date me?" she said as the others seemed a bit more confused now.

Ron looked a bit stumped at that. "Well...you're pretty," he stumbled out, turning a bit red. "I...I don't know, we used to date before and it was alright...wasn't it?"

Hermione sighed, rubbing her forehead. "That's it? It was alright?" She wasn't feeling much better at hearing that from him.

Ron looked even more stumped on what to say to that, but Harry spoke up. "Mione, what's going on? Did something happen?"

Hermione sighed; she should have known they'd have questions. "Yes and no. I just...need..." She trailed off on a sigh. "This is stupid, I'm going to go."

She turned to leave, but a hand caught her wrist. Turning back around, she found Sirius of all people stopping her. "Kitten, let's go have a drink, shall we?"

Hermione sighed again. "Do we have to? Can't I just go and be embarrassed at home? Alone?"

"No." This being said by Remus as he too stood up. "We're going to have a drink," he said, taking her other hand and leading her out as her two best friends looked on in confusion.

Remus and Sirius led her into the library and sent up wards to not only keep the other two out, but to keep their discussion private. Sirius had her sit down with on the sofa next to him, and Remus went to pour them all drinks.

He handed them all a glass of fire-whiskey and Hermione huffed. She didn't like fire-whiskey. Sirius smirked. "I know you don't like this stuff, Kitten, but it'll help you talk to us. So drink up."

She grimaced as she sipped at it, both men not saying a word until she was on her second glass. Her belly was on fire but it was becoming comfortable at least, not seeming like it was about to make her belch flames anymore.

"Okay, so what is really going on, Hermione," Remus finally asked after taking a seat on the other side of her.

Feeling a little looser with the alcohol coursing through her body and blood, Hermione shrugged. "I was just trying to see if anyone even found me attractive. Most blokes don't."

At the surprised looks on the faces of both men, Hermione shrugged. "Fine, maybe attractive isn't the right word. They want to shag me, some of them anyway, but that's all I seem to be good for." She took another sip of her drink.

Remus stared at her for several moments before he shook his head as if to clear it. "You're going to have to explain what happened, because I've no clue how you could think that you weren't attractive at all, let alone think that you aren't good enough beyond a few shags."

Sirius nodded. "Yes, Kitten. I'm not fully understanding this either. You're gorgeous."

Hermione snorted. "I am not," she said, taking another drink. "At least...you never thought I was before, so don't try saying that I am now." She wondered if maybe she should have eaten something before drinking the whiskey, though she gave a mental shrug and moved on.

Sirius' brows shot up again, and Remus was now frowning at her. "I have too." Sirius said. "I've always thought you were beautiful. Why would you assume I didn't?"

"Hermione, what happened?" Remus asked again.

Hermione sighed. "I slept with an arse that told me he loved me and apparently was only going through a phase."

Both men frowned more. "I wasn't aware that you were even seeing anyone," Sirius said.

Hermione sighed. "I didn't mean recently. You know, the whole relationship thing is a joke. A bloke tells you something just to get in your knickers and then as soon as he's bored with you, boom, he's gone. What is with you men and feeding women lines of shite?"

Remus and Sirius shared a quick glance before Remus spoke again. "Hermione, not all men do that, you know. Do you think Ron was feeding you a line about wanting to get back with you? Do you think he just wanted in your...er..."

"Knickers," Sirius finished for him, for which Remus was grateful. He was uncomfortable talking about Hermione's knickers, especially with Hermione.

Hermione shrugged. "Maybe its only the one's I'm actually interested in," she muttered, not thinking about what she said.

Sirius sighed. "Kitten, just because one bloke lied..."

"Four," Hermione said, cutting him off. "Four lied, all in a row." She finished off her second glass, not even noticing the burn of it any longer.

Remus sighed, taking her free hand. "Hermione, not all men lie. Surely you've been with someone who didn't lie."

Hermione stayed silent for several minutes. "One person. His name is Brian, but he doesn't really want me either. We are each other's...fluff."

Both men seemed startled again. "What?" Remus said.

Hermione shrugged. "Its what we are for each other. He is my fluff, and I'm his, I suppose. It's nothing more than shagging when we need it."

Sirius growled. "Hermione Jean Granger, I swear to Merlin...I should put you over my knee. I thought you had more respect for yourself than that."

Hermione stood up, a bit wobbly, but she was steady enough to glare down at him. "You will do no such thing, Sirius Black. I'm an adult. You of all people have no right to criticize me for doing...what you yourself do. You have bits of fluff! You shag girls and rarely see them more than once. I, at least, am only shagging one bloke and have been off and on for years. I'm not hopping from bed to bed seeing if I can make it through all the single women of Britain...er...men, I mean."

Remus rolled his eyes and Sirius glared at her. "No, it sounds like you're purposely shagging some bloke just so you can hide from the world," Sirius said.

Hermione stomped her foot. "I'm not hiding."

Remus held up his hand. "Why did you really come here? To hear us all tell you that you're pretty? I don't think you really think that you're not. So what is the reason you're here?"

Hermione paused. "I want to know that not all men are lying little bastards. I want to know that there are men out there that won't feed women a lie just to get them to sleep with them. I want to know..." She sighed as her shoulders drooped a bit. "I want to know its not just me that's the problem."

She looked at them both. "I'm worth more than just a shag, aren't I?" she asked softly.

Sirius sighed and reached out a hand, and pulled her back down onto the sofa, his arm coming around her and pulling her against him. "Sweetheart, you are not the problem. I don't know exactly what happened, but it's not you."

Remus took her hand. "Hermione, you're worth more than just a shag. Why do you think..." He trailed off and Hermione looked at him.

"Why do I think what?" She asked, eyes stinging a bit with what she'd said and feeling the same rejected pain filling her again.

Sirius sighed. "Why do you think we've never gone near you." He said, earning a dirty look from Remus for saying that as soon as Hermione looked at Sirius.

Hermione frowned, as she looked at the shaggy haired Marauder. "What?"

"Stop glaring at me, Moony. I know you've looked at her, I seen it. I know I have, too," Sirius said as Remus glared even more. The shaggy haired Marauder sent him a look as soon as Hermione turned back to Remus.

Hermione frowned more, as she looked at Remus. "What is he talking about?"

Remus sighed as well, knowing the look Sirius was sending him. "Hermione, you are gorgeous and we've...noticed it. Trust me."

Hermione stood up again to face them both. "What?"

Sirius smirked at the shocked look on her face. "We've noticed how pretty you are; we just know that you deserve more than two old men that haven't much to offer beyond a few shags."

Hermione paused, dumbfounded. "You both wanted to shag me?" She asked Sirius.

Sirius grinned at her. "Of course, Kitten! You're sexy as hell and can hold a conversation better than most women I've met. What isn't there to like about you?"

Remus fought the need to roll his eyes. "He's right. Most men would kill to have you give them a second glance. If they're too stupid to see how special you are, you don't need them, love."

Hermione was still stunned, but they were making her feel better. "Do you...do you two really believe that?"

Sirius winked at her. "Kitten, I think you could get any man you wanted, if you really put your mind to it. You've obviously not seen the appreciative looks sent your way when we're out with the boys. You know, the nights you actually join us."

Hermione stood there pondering that. "But...every other bloke I've been with while I was at university..."

"Was an idiot." Remus said. "But you have to remember, you were in college. Most of the nitwits that go to college are only after a quick shag anyway. Not all of them mind you, but obviously the ones you were spending time with."

Sirius nodded. "You should of seen the trail of girls I left behind in my university days. It made what I do now look like a tea party."

Hermione's lip curled. "That doesn't help my opinion of you, Sirius." It only reinforced her thoughts that she wouldn't want him beyond the physical. He was too much like a little boy in many ways and she knew she'd end up killing him if she'd done more than just shag him.

Sirius shrugged. "But it proves my point. Boys in school are arses and only want one thing. I'm sorry that you had such a bad time of it, love. You, more than anyone I know, deserve better than that, but you can't let a bad string of blokes in school sour you on relationships."

Hermione sighed. "I have been soured on it."

Remus stood up and took her hands. "You can't hide from love, Hermione. You can't lock yourself away, only having your...fluff," he said, the word sounding bitter coming from him. "You need to get out there, you need to open yourself up for more. Yes, you may get hurt, but that is part of life. You can't only live half of your life. You'll just grow old and bitter if you do that."

Sirius nodded. "He's right, love. You can't. If you grow old and bitter, who's gonna have the patience and understanding to put up with us old codgers?"

Remus turned to glare at Sirius. "I'm not old, thank you. I'm certainly not an old codger." He looked back at Hermione. "However, if you grew old and bitter, it would be very sad. You have so much to give, Hermione; don't let the jerks you dated before keep you from having what you want."

Hermione sighed. "I'm not sure what I want is a good idea, anyway."

Sirius frowned. "You won't know unless you try, love."

Hermione gave him a shy smile. "Do you really think I could have anyone I put my mind to getting?"

Remus smirked, glad to see the smile, even if it was small. "Yes. If he doesn't immediately jump at your offer, show him why you're worth the second look. You're a treasure, love. Don't let anyone ever make you think differently."

Hermione looked to Sirius who was nodding at her. "You know Kitten, if I was ten years younger, I'd give any bloke you were interested in a good run for his money."

Hermione smile fell. "You think...you think you're too old for me?" If Sirius was too old for her...Lucius was a few years older than him, so what did that say about that?

Remus looked a bit alarmed as he looked at Sirius, but Sirius shrugged, having an idea that whomever had caught her eye was not a spring chicken. "I think, love, that we both know age isn't everything. So what bloke has you wondering about my age?"

Hermione blushed. "I...I don't want to say."

Sirius grinned at her. "Come on, love. Spill it, or I'll have Moony here ply you with more fire-whiskey until you do. As long as you don't tell us you got a thing for Snivellus, I doubt we'd think too badly of you."

Hermione laughed softly. "Fine. It's...Lucius Malfoy." Biting back a cringe at saying it out loud to them. No one knew of her attraction to Lucius, not even Brian. He just knew she had a new interest and that she didn't have a shot in hell of getting him.

Sirius looked a bit stunned and Remus looked almost relieved, before Remus spoke up. "If that...if that is who you want, Hermione, I say go get him."

Hermione perked up. "Yeah?"

Sirius shrugged. "He isn't who I'd have picked for you, but you could do worse, I suppose. He's smart, and isn't a total wanker these days."

Hermione smirked. "He has done a lot to make up for what he did during the war. He's sexy, too."

Remus bit back a wince, not needing to hear who she thought was sexy. "Then there you have it. He'd be a fool not to jump at whatever you offered." This time, he did wince.

Sirius folded his arms over his chest. "Just don't let him treat you like a bit of fluff, love. Otherwise, I'll kick both your arses. Got it? You're worth more than that, Kitten. If he doesn't see that, then he's not worth your time."

Hermione beamed. "I got it. Thank you, both of you. As for the...er...you two wanting to...shag me. I...I'm not..." Not wanting to insult them, as they had made her feel better after all, she still wanted them to know that she didn't want them, either. She had gotten over Sirius already and hadn't really looked at Remus before.

Sirius held up his hand. "I said we wanted a shag with how pretty you turned out to be, Kitten, not that we were in love with you or anything. We wouldn't shag you anyway, you know, being our friend and all."

Hermione didn't quite hold back her relieved look. "Right. Good. So we can just..."

"Forget it ever got mentioned," Remus finished for her.

She nodded. "Exactly. So no hard feelings or awkwardness?"

Sirius shook his head. "None at all, love. Now why don't you go home and get some sleep. You, I think, have a seduction for a certain blond to plan." He sent her a wink.

Hermione blushed a bit. "You know...I guess I do."

She gave both men a hug and stumbled her way to the door, still a bit tipsy. Remus took the wards down and waited for her to leave before sending them back.

"I've never looked at her like that or wanted to shag her. I was gonna ask, why do you think I was glad she didn't take Ron back. He'd have only made a mess of things," Remus stated, glaring mildly at Sirius. "She was my student for goodness sake, and I've known her too long to even be able to think about it without feeling like a pervert. She's more like my niece or something."

Sirius smirked. "Neither have I, but she didn't know that and she needed the boost to her ego. If it wasn't for the fact that she finally stopped looking at me like she wanted to...well, you know...I'd never have said what I did. She's had a crush on me for years. I've no clue what finally got her to let it go, but thank Merlin for it. I'd have felt like a dirty old man for even contemplating such a thing as taking her to bed. Had I ever done it...I don't think I'd have ever been able to look at myself in the mirror again."

Remus snorted. "Not to mention, Harry would kill us both for even thinking it."

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, there is that. That doesn't mean I don't want to murder the little pricks that treated her so horribly before. I just hope that what we told her tonight helps her to move on."

Remus nodded. "I agree. I didn't know...I can't believe she had a...lover that was nothing but a shag now and again."

Sirius sighed. "I can't believe she compared what I did to herself. Am I that bad of an influence, Moony?"

Remus snorted. "Yes. I've told you that for years. Hopefully she'll tell her somewhat lover to fluff off."

Sirius barked out a laugh. "Fluff off? How very well put. Think it'll be awkward letting her think we wanted to shag her at all? I'd hate to have to take it back. Especially after seeing her smiling and looking like she felt better over it all."

Remus sighed. "Well, I'm not about to take that away from her. I'd rather there be a bit of awkwardness for a while than have her thinking she wasn't worth more than she's had in the past from men. I'll take whatever I have to if it means she's happy."

Sirius nodded. "I'd have to agree with you, old boy."

Remus glared. "I'm not old and I'll thank you to keep your old comments to yourself." With that, he pulled down his wards and left the library.

Sirius smirked. "You're too easy, Moony." He got up to refill his glass of fire-whiskey. He shook his head. "Lucius-sodding-Malfoy. Well, Lucius, you better not cock this up. You hurt her, and I'll strangle your perfectly groomed arse," he muttered, taking a deep drink.

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_**A/N:** I couldn't help myself with Sirius and Remus at the end. Yes, I insulted my beloved Severus, and I'm sorry for it...but it fit with how Sirius would see him due to their past. Happy holidays and Please Leave Me Your Thoughts. Take care._


	4. Chapter 4

**_A/N:_**_ Hello everyone. Thank you all for the wonderful reviews, I loved them all, and will get to the few I missed here very soon. As you can see, my plans didn't go according to...well, my plan. lol. I had hoped to have this chapter posted by Christmas, but it took a bit longer than expected to get it just right. However, I've got it ready now and hope you all love it. I'm working on Epilogue now, so as soon as it is ready, I'll post it. Take care all and Happy Holidays!_

**_Special Thanks to Dirty Things, who did a wonderful job correcting my errors. Thanks, hun, I really appreciate it._**

**_Disclaimer: I do not own anything pertaining to the HP universe, just writing this for fun, for free, and because I'm naturally pervy. lol._**

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**Chapter 4  
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With only a few days before Christmas, Hermione thought over not only what she'd already done, but what she had planned to do. After waking up the next morning, a bit hungover and very embarrassed at what all she'd said, she'd gotten up and taken a shower. At least she had heard and remembered what her dear friends had said.

She was still smiling smiling at learning her old crush had wanted to shag her after all, and that a man she had never thought of as sexy before wanted to shag her as well. She didn't want either man, but it did add a bit of a spring to her step after learning about it.

She knew they were right, though. She had been hiding. _I want you to take what you want, not settle for mediocrity. A copy is just that. If you want something, truly want something, you shouldn't let anything stand in your way. You never would have before and I want to know who took that from you. Who took your fire, damn you? _ Lucius' words still echoed in her mind.

_Four boys,_ she thought. _Four boys took it, but two men handed part of it back. I think I'll get the rest of my fire back from you, Lucius. I think you wouldn't have been so angry at me losing that fire, if you didn't want to get burned by_ _it._

She paused, rubbing scented lotion into her skin. _Maybe burned isn't the right word, but you want those flames directed at you. Otherwise, you wouldn't have asked why I didn't come to you myself._ She was hoping she wasn't wrong, that she wasn't about to make a fool of herself.

This newly-found confidence was still fragile. One wrong move could shatter it if she wasn't careful and even knowing that, she pushed herself to carry through with her plan.

During the last several days, she' already contacted Brian. She'd sent him an owl and gone to see him at his flat after his reply. She'd been surprised at how well he took her ending things with him. He'd been pleased that she seemed to finally be taking an interest in dating again.

He wasn't stupid; he knew that she hadn't been with anyone other than him since they'd made their arrangement. While he was mildly disappointed at losing her as a bed mate, he was very glad that she was finally taking a chance at getting what she wanted. Fluff or not, he still cared about her in a platonic way.

Though he didn't say so, he knew he wouldn't be surprised if their friendship ended along with everything else. When she'd taken her leave, he'd silently wished her well in her life and knew it was time to for him to move on, too. She hadn't been the only one to use their odd relationship as a crutch after all.

Now, Hermione stared at her closet full of clothes and debated what to wear. Already she had slipped on a pair of sexy knickers, a new purchase for her plan, and the matching bra to accompany them, both in a deep purple that bordered on being black instead.

She debated her choices, not sure she wanted to arrive looking like a tart but not wanting to be too conservative, either. Finally, she chose a black skirt that went almost to her ankles, but that had a slit that up the side to allow her to walk, adding in a charcoal gray top that clung nicely to her figure and had a nice shimmer to the material.

Slipping on a pair of strappy heels, she sat down to do her hair and make-up. Deciding to leave her hair wild and curling down her back, she went for a lighter look with her make-up. Again, she didn't want to look too tart-like.

Ready to go, she took a deep breath to settle her nerves and apparated to the Manor. Walking up the lit pathway, she again took a breath to steady her nerves before knocking on the door.

A small elf answered her knock, letting her inside, though it informed her that young Master and young Mistress Malfoy were not in this evening. She gave it a smile and asked if she could see Lucius.

The elf bowed and popped away for a moment, returning only a minute later to lead her to a his office. A quick knock on the door had him calling for them to enter, and she almost let out a snort of laughter at the confused and surprised look that Lucius wasn't fully able to hide at seeing her there.

"Hello, Hermione. What brings you here, my dear?" He asked, standing as she walked inside, the elf leaving them to talk in private. Lucius discreetly allowed his eyes to run over her frame and took in her in wardrobe.

She gave him a small smile. "I probably should have owled first. Am I interrupting anything?" she asked, not answering his question at all.

Lucius' brow crinkled a small bit, but he shook his head. "You're not interrupting at all, my dear. You're always welcome here, as you know."

Hermione's small smile stayed in place as he moved towards her. "Am I? I wasn't sure I would still be welcome after...after our last conversation."

His brow rose at that. "Did I give you that impression? I'm sorry, my dear. That wasn't what I intended for you to think at all. Why don't I get you a drink and we can talk about it."

She shook her head no. "No, thank you. I've had enough to drink as of late." Lucius gave her a slightly curious look, but took her arm and guided her towards his sofa.

Hermione took a seat, her legs crossing, well aware of the slit in her skirt allowing the skin underneath to show. She smiled, seeing his eyes drop for just a moment before they met her gaze again as he too sat down on the sofa.

"Now, why would you think you weren't welcome after your last visit?" he asked.

She gave a small shrug. "It wasn't... the most pleasant of discussions, so I figured you'd still be angry with me."

Lucius sighed. "I was angry, yes, but I'm not angry with you anymore. Though I am curious as to your reasons for being here now. You may have come to see Ginerva or Draco, but after finding out that they are away for the evening, why ask to speak with me if you thought I was angry?"

Hermione debated how to answer him, still fighting down her nerves. "I actually didn't come to see Ginny or Draco."

His brow rose again. "So you came just to speak with me?" His eyes roved over her, taking in her sitting there dressed as she was.

She nodded. "I did." Well, she was aware of his inspection of her with how closely she was paying attention, though she did have to give him props for how barely noticeable it was. It made her wonder how many times he'd looked her over without her being aware of it.

Eyes on hers, looking like they were searching for an answer in them, he tilted his head a tiny bit. "Why?"

Remembering his skill in Legilimency that she'd never once thought he had, she glanced away. "Because I've done some thinking lately and...you were right."

He frowned. "About what, exactly?"

"That my past was relevant to what caused us to discuss things in your office that night. That I was settling for something that wasn't real due to it," she said.

He leaned back, studying her. "And?"

Her lips curved. "And it took not only what you said, but two very good friends having an interesting discussion with me to see what all I'd been doing lately."

His frown grew slightly at not only what she said, but the slight sparkle in her eyes as she said it. "Which is?"

"Hiding, apparently. Though I hadn't seen it that way," she told him.

Lucius held her gaze again, debating whether or not to send a probe to her mind to see what caused the sparkle. "May I ask what was said and by whom so I understand exactly?"

Hermione's lips curved more. "Basically, Remus and Sirius got me very drunk and we all said things that without the alcohol, I doubt would have come out at all."

Lucius' brow shot up. "They got you drunk," he said, thinking about what he'd seen in her memories versus the sparkle in her eyes now.

She nodded. "Yes, well...it didn't help that I went there and said I needed an honest answer, only to threaten their...more sensitive regions with a hex or two if they laughed. I wouldn't doubt if part of the need for alcohol wasn't a way to keep my spell casting to a minimum."

His brows rose more as his lips quirked. "You threatened to hex..." He chuckled softly as he let that statement drop unfinished. "That is interesting, to say the least. So what did they say that apparently got you thinking about what all I'd said?"

Hermione debated again, and decided she wanted to keep that to herself. "Many ego-boosting things; however, it brought me back to our discussion."

He could have pressed for her to tell him, could have forced himself into her mind to see for himself, but for now, he decided to see where this was going. "Alright, what about it?"

She shifted to face him a bit better. "You asked why I didn't come to you on my own."

_Interesting place to start_, he thought. "I did, but I believe you said that I am off limits and that I intimidate you. Nor did you want to be humiliated by me."

"All true," she said, which didn't help him understand why she was here at all. "You are both of those, and I don't want to be humiliated."

"Then, why are you here?" he asked, even more confused and now starting to get annoyed by the unfamiliar feeling.

She smiled at him. "Because even with all three of those reasons, it doesn't change the fact that I'm attracted to you." Her heart beat wildly inside her at having said that.

He regarded her with pale eyes. "But those three reasons still exist. You still believe them, so the fact that you are attracted to me seems moot, does it not?"

Hermione wasn't sure how to take that at first, so she decided to try again. "Maybe I don't care about the three reasons."

His brow rose again. "You don't care that I would humiliate you?"

Hermione smirked. "No, I mean, I don't think that you would."

"Why the change of heart on that idea?" he asked, curious.

Hermione shrugged. "You could have done so that night, and didn't. You asked questions that were hard for me to answer, but you didn't rudely throw my attraction back in my face, or pat on me on the head in a condescending way. If you didn't then, I've decided that you probably wouldn't now either."

"Did you really think that I would?" he asked, still curious.

"The thought had crossed my mind, yes. It wasn't anything personal against you, it was more my own views on men in general that had me thinking that way," she told him.

Lucius considered that. "Which only has me curious what your friends said to you, exactly."

Hermione's lips curved in remembrance. "They just pointed out a few things that I should have been smart enough to figure out on my own."

Lucius hummed softly. "That doesn't answer my question."

Hermione looked at him. "I wasn't planning on answering it. Some things are best kept to one's self. Now, back to what I was saying, I don't see the humiliation part being a problem, and I've decided that you being intimidating isn't going to effect my decision either."

His lips curved. "Must have been one hell of a conversation for you to have decided all of that, my dear. Not many get over their intimidation of me." He saw that the fire seemed to be inside her again. At least some of it, anyway. He just wasn't sure if she'd gotten it all back yet or not.

Hermione laughed softly. "It was. The intimidation part...I'm not saying it's not still there a small bit, but...I'm not letting it change my mind. Whatever happens, happens. You being who you are in that regard won't change the outcome either way, nor will it change what I want."

He studied her again. "Which is what, my dear?"

"You." Her voice was matter-of-fact.

He hummed again. "Interesting. Did you decide a copy wasn't enough, Hermione? Decided to have a go at the real thing?"

Hermione frowned, not having expected those words from him. "Not exactly."

He stood up, holding out his hand for her and when she took it with a slightly confused frown upon her face, he pulled her up. Her hand dropped from his at the look on his face as he considered his next words to her.

"Then, what exactly did you have in mind? Did you want to see if I'd take you up on your offer? If I'd let you satisfy your...desires like you wanted to do with Black? I'm not sure your other lover would approve of such a thing," he said, taking a step towards her, though she backed up, still frowning at him. That didn't stop him stalking towards her further.

Hermione backed up even more, with each step he took. "That wasn't my thoughts at all."

His hand snaked out and caught her wrist to stop her retreat. "Then, what exactly did you come here for?"

Hermione huffed out a breath. "I told you. I came here because I want you."

His eyes flitted over her face, still looking for his answers. "Yes, you did. The question is why?"

She tried to jerk her wrist free, but he held her firmly. "Because I'm tired of settling."

That drew him up. "What does your lover have to say about that, I wonder."

Her eyes flashed, angry at him for pushing her. It seemed like he was trying to taunt her, to humiliate her. _Was I wrong?_ "He isn't my lover anymore."

He saw her anger and her flicker of doubt in her eyes and chose his next words accordingly. "So he ditched you and now you're looking to find someone to take his place? Or are you forced to seek those you want on your own now?"

She jerked at her wrist again, harder this time in her anger. "He didn't ditch me. I ended things with him. I didn't want to just...I didn't want to play it safe with him anymore."

Still holding her wrist, he pulled her closer to him. "Why?"

Hermione was furious now, angry at herself for thinking that this time would be any different than those in her past. "Because he isn't who I want and I'm tired of not having who I want."

His eyes skimmed over her face. "So what do you hope to gain with me? Am I means to an end? Like your potion-induced experience with Black?"

Hermione stopped struggling when it was obviously he was stronger than her. "I'm not trying to shag you to get over you. I did what I did concerning Sirius because I knew I wouldn't want him past the physical side of things. I already explained that and you don't get to judge me for I what I did before."

She was glaring at him now, breathing raggedly in her anger. "I don't want to just shag you. I don't want another piece of fluff. I've had that already."

That had him biting back a smirk; no one had ever referred to him as a piece of fluff before. "So what do you want, my dear?" His voice was softer now.

The slight change in his tone had her pausing again. "What?"

His lips curved a small fraction. "What do you want? I know what I want. So what do you want?"

She frowned again. _He knows what he wants? Does that mean he wants me?_ "I told you. How many bloody times do I have to say the same damn thing?" she growled, getting frustrated over it all.

"You've told me that you want me, not what you plan on doing once you have me. Do you plan on keeping me, or am I means to an end? Do you plan on letting your concerns of who exactly would approve of it, considering who I am, effect your decision? What do you want, Hermione?" he asked.

Hermione took a deep breath, understanding at last what he was asking. "I want you. All of you, for as long as you'll have me. I don't give a damn who approves or disapproves, either. I'm sick of settling and I'm ready to take what I want. But I'll tell you this...if you don't really want me, if you don't want what being with me means, which means that I'll not be easily tossed over out of boredom, nor will I be lied to at all, then you'd better let me go now." Her voice was firm at the end, and there was no mistaking that she meant what she expected in return.

He considered her answer for a moment, still trying to read in her eyes if she was truly ready for him or not. "What if I were to tell you that once I have you, I don't intend to ever let you go?"

_Oh god, does he really mean it? _ she wondered as her heart beat even faster now, not sure she could take it happening again, where she put her faith in someone only to be shut down later. But as she studied him like he'd been studying her, she decided that it was worth the risk. "Then, I'd ask why the hell we're both still standing here fully dressed."

Seeing exactly what he wanted to see in her eyes and hearing exactly what he'd wanted to hear, Lucius liked her response better than the one he had expected to get from her. His lips curved a second before he bent down and kissed her.

She'd almost expected something hard and fast from him, but the kiss was neither. It was soft, and it was slow as he coaxed her mouth open for him, his tongue gently probing inside to glide with hers as he eased her closer to him. He seemed hesitant, almost as if he expected her to pull away.

Only she didn't. Instead, she moved onto her toes and slid her arms up around his neck to pull him closer to her, dancing her tongue along with his in answer to his almost questioning exploration.

He broke the kiss only moments into it, pulling away enough to look down at her, to look for even a hint of hesitation or a sign that she'd changed her mind, but Hermione pulled him back to her, kissing him for all she was worth.

The low growl that rumbled from him was the only warning she had before he was ravishing her lips, warring his tongue with hers exactly like she'd first expected and just like she'd wanted.

His hands slid down her frame, molding her to him as he continued tasting her lips. One moved up to dive into her hair, the riotous curls tangling in his fingers as he forced her head to tilt, to change the angle of the kiss. His other hand continued down her body, settling on the curve of her rear, as he pressed her against him, lifting her just enough to let her feel just how much he wanted her.

She felt his growing erection press against her thigh, and it caused a slow burning to start inside her. She had wanted him for so long, that now that he was here in her arms, she almost wasn't sure that this was really happening.

Her hands slid over his shoulders as he broke the kiss and moved down her jaw, trailing kisses along the column of her neck. His teeth nipped at her fragrant skin as he moved back up, soothing each nibble with a lave his tongue. Each tiny bite he left behind caused goosebumps to break out on her flesh, and Hermione's tiny gasps slipped from her parted lips as her fingers dug into his rounded shoulders while the heat grew inside her.

He found her lips again, pressing her backwards until she bumped into his desk, his hand finding her waist and lifting her to sit on it. When the split in her skirt didn't allow her legs to fully part for him, Lucius knew it was time to move this somewhere else or to strip her of the skirt all together, though he rather liked the idea of having her in his bed, where he'd have more room to maneuver about.

He broke the kiss and pulled her to her feet again. Seeing her eyes showing her confusion, he spoke. "I figure my bedroom would be a better place for this to continue, unless you really want the first time I take you to be on my desk," he said, already reaching to pull to his wand.

They were gone with a soft crack before she could respond, though the moment they appeared in his bedroom, she was kissing him again. Her response let him know that she had no problems with the change in venue.

It wasn't long before he had her stripped down to her knickers, his own clothing reduced to just his trousers as they moved together on the bed. With Hermione's bra gone, Lucius feasted on her breasts, first one, then the other, with each swipe of his tongue or nip of his teeth, she arched into him.

His hands stroked the the rounded flesh, his mouth laving them, suckling gently at the pouting nipples. Hermione arched her back even more at the tingling pleasure that swept through her. Lucius ran his hands and mouth all over them before moving down her body.

Leaving soft bites on her belly, his tongue glided around her navel as his hands slid down her legs, purposely missing the place at her juncture that was sending out wave after wave of pure heat. He kissed her, stroking the satin skin of her thighs, teasing and claiming her with his touch.

She tried to sit up, wanting to touch him, but he pressed her gently back down onto the pillows. Anything she might have said was lost with a sharp intake of breath as his fingers stroked down the lace covering her center.

He placed a kiss on her belly as he slid the triangle of fabric down her thighs, the rush of cool air suddenly on her heated flesh making her gasp. His eyes moved up to hers, and he took in her parted lips, her flushed cheeks, and her eyes that were full of heat, heat and passion that were burning just for him, and he hadn't really done anything yet. That alone had his lips curving again, knowing that after this, she was his and that he would not be letting her escape from him again.

He saw that she was ready for him already, but he wasn't. Another part of his anatomy was more than ready, but he wanted to hear her sigh and gasp his name before he slid into her. He wanted to fully own her before he took all that he wanted from her.

He stroked his hand softly from the valley between her breasts down to her center. To his surprise and delight, he heard something that almost sounded like a soft purr, so he repeated the motion, wondering if she'd purr again, and she did. The sound was almost his undoing as tingles shot down his spine. He'd never actually heard a woman purr like a cat before, and it made him itch to slip inside her, but for now, he fought it.

This time, when he ran his fingers down her skin along the same path, he lets his fingers slip inside her moist folds. Hearing her soft sigh, he slowly worked the hidden nub, and the teasing caress had her moaning for him with only a few carefully placed strokes.

His fingers working her faster made her moans escape more and more, only she wasn't gasping, like he wanted. He pulled his hand away from her, the loss of pleasure making her groan in frustration, but instead of giving her back his fingers, he replaced them with his tongue.

Her gasp of delight sounded just like he wanted to hear and had his own need clawing to get free. His hands held her thighs apart, and he had to tighten his grip on her as she squirmed underneath him at the magic his tongue was producing. She was absolutely delicious, more so that he'd thought she would be and he wasn't sure how long he could withstand torturing them both like he was. Feeling her body bowing with her impending release, he bit down lightly on the overly sensitive button, making her cry out with the wave of pleasure that raced through her.

Sliding back up her body as his trousers vanished and left him naked, he crashed his lips down onto hers, unable to hold back any longer as he shifted over her. His hips settling between her thighs as his tongue still warred with hers, he slid himself inside her, both of them sighing in pleasure when he finally filled her.

He paused, letting her have a moment to adjust to him while letting himself enjoy the sensations of her tight and pulsing walls. She was exquisite, and this fiery creature was all his. He didn't care what it took or what he had to do; she was his and he would make her see that, even if that meant he wouldn't let her leave his bed until she fully understood it.

His hips started to gently rock against hers, withdrawing slowly as he watched her face and the shifting expressions on it, before he pushed back inside. He doubted he would be able to keep things easy for long, but he was taking the time to fully savor her before the passion he could already feel licking up his spine took them both over completely.

Her hips lifted to meet his thrusts as her legs wrapped tighter around him, both actions seemed to pull him just a tiny bit deeper inside her, and made him groan at the delectable feeling of her surrounding him so wonderfully. It had his already slippery grasp on his control slip just a bit more, even as he fought to hold onto it a bit longer.

However, he didn't take into account just how skilled this fiery woman was in getting what she wanted while in bed with a lover. As much as she too was enjoying the slow rhythm he was giving her, it wasn't enough. She wanted more and damned if she wasn't going to get exactly what she needed from him.

Her eyes on his, she purposely squeezed him with her walls, making them grip his shaft tightly, then release him, only to grip him again, almost milking him with her slick sheath. The sensations of what she was doing made something inside him snap with a harsh groan.

His hand found her hip as he reared back and slammed into her. Her head pressed back into the soft pillow, her eyes snapped shut, and she cried out while digging her nails into his back, scraping his pale flesh and pulling another groan from him before Lucius reared back and slammed into her again. She cried out a second time, and all thoughts of slow and easy were gone as he rocked hard and deep against her again and again.

"Lucius..." she panted as the pleasure went rocketing through her veins, "...yes...more," she moaned.

He ground and rotated his hips, finding a spot that they both knew was hard for many lovers to find on women, a spot that had her toes curling in pure bliss as he drove into her harder as her cries increased. Her breath came in short bursts from her lungs as her walls started to tighten around him.

Sweat pooled between them, slicking their skin and making them glide together that much easier. She cried out as she went over the edge, her walls clamping down on him, making him grunt in pleasure as he continued to move.

He grabbed her leg from his hip and brought it up to his shoulder, allowing him a deeper stroke as he moved with her. His hands found and clamped onto hers, their fingers entwined as he hammered into her, all of his weight on his hands that were trapping hers. She cried out again and again as his new position had him hitting that special spot repeatedly with each driving thrust.

Her hands flexed in his as her velvety sheath clamped tighter with each new stroke. Lucius knew he wouldn't last long with this position, but it felt so good, he couldn't bring himself to shift into another one. His own orgasm built quickly in him the more her walls pulsed and vibrated around him, making his strokes harder, her whimpering cries slipping from her as he hit that spot once again, and as she clamped down tighter, it only served to make his next stroke even harder. Resulting in a highly pleasurable circle that neither thought of changing.

The tension in him almost at the breaking point, he moved one of his hands down between them. Finding her hidden gem, wanting her to scream before he exploded. Wanting to hear his name tearing from her lips as she lost all sense while he gave her everything he had.

It didn't take long to get what he wanted, either. Her walls fisted around him, her body shaking and shuddering while she screamed his name long and loud as she went flying over the edge. All of it, the harsh and jagged sound she made, the excruciating pleasure her body was pulling from him, and every drop of her passion that was just for him, all had him practically roaring as he gave a final deep stroke, and detonated inside her. They both panted as he all but collapsed on top of her.

Her arms wrapped languidly around him as he eased her leg off of his shoulder and back onto the bed. His breathing was just as harsh and erratic as hers, and he let his head rest against her shoulder. Both floating in their post-coital haze as they tried to calm their breathing and their racing hearts.

When he finally found the strength to move, he moved off of her, pulling her with him to press against his side. With his arm around her and her head on his shoulder while her hand rested on his chest, neither said a word as they simply basked in bliss.

Finally, Hermione couldn't help the words that came rumbling out of her, her voice raspy with her earlier cries. "All I have to say is, if you even think of not keeping me around after that, I might just have to hex the life right out of you."

Lucius chuckled softly. "I believe that works both ways, my sweet. I should warn you, I'm very skilled at sending hexes too. I doubt you've the speed needed to block how quickly and efficiently I can send them, either."

Hermione closed her eyes and breathed deeply at that. "Sounds like we're both stuck with each other then," she said, snuggling a bit closer against him.

"That it does, my sweet Hermione. Any regrets?" he asked.

She nodded and that had him rolling her onto her back quickly, his eyes piercing her with the intense stare. "What, may I ask, are those, my dear?" he asked as he pinned her to the mattress, feeling his earlier aggravation with her returning.

She smirked at him. "That I didn't figure all of this out sooner."

He paused at that. "Oh?"

Her smirk grew as she slipped her wrists out of his grasp to wrap around his neck. "Yes. Had I found that fire you were so angry at me losing sooner, we'd have ended up in bed long before now."

Lucius felt his lips curving at understanding now what exactly her regrets were. "Hmm...while that is a shame, I'm certainly glad you've got it now and that we're where we're at. You're still not getting away from me after this."

Hermione chuckled. "Neither are you. You are, as I said, stuck with me now."

His smile said that he agreed with her statement, as did the kiss he leaned down to give her. She happily accepted it as he glided his tongue along with hers. However, she pulled back when a thought hit her.

"I do have one question for you though," she murmured.

His brow rose. "What is that, my dear?"

Her lips curved. "How big of a fit do you think Draco is going to pitch when he sees me at breakfast come morning? Especially when it'll be obvious I spent the night doing rather naughty things with you."

"Does it matter?" he asked, curious to see if they were really back to her earlier problem with coming to him at all.

She shook her head. "No, I was just wondering how big a tantrum he was going to throw and if I'd be able to keep a straight face through it all. He is rather entertaining when he's angry."

"Personally, I don't care how angry he gets; you are mine now and that is all that matters to me." His eyes still searched hers, and when he found amusement dancing in her eyes along with the approval in them at his words, he knew she was indeed finally ready for him and all that would entail. It was about bloody time too.

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_**A/N:** Mmm...I wouldn't let Lucius get away either. He's so yummy. Okay, epilogue coming soon. Take care everyone, and please leave me your thoughts._


	5. Epilogue

_**A/N:** Sorry guys that it took me so long to update. I killed another computer and am now stuck with very old mac tower until I can afford a new machine. Well, afford the machine I really want. *Sigh* Thank you all for your wonderful reviews, I will get to them soon, I promise. I'm still playing catch up after my computer died. Here is the epilogue and I hope you all like it. Take care all, and Happy belated New Year._

_**This last chapter hasn't been Beta'd yet, but I wanted to get it posted for you all. When it does get looked over and corrected, I'll just re-post it. **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own anything pertaining to the HP franchise. I just play with the characters for fun, for free, and because I'm a closet perv. lol.**_

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**Part 5: Epilogue**

Lucius kept her in his bed all night, taking turns shagging her rotten and making pure, sweet love to her. Going from rough and hard, to gentle and whispered caresses of both his hands and hips. Ravishing her and coaxing her, claiming her and treasuring her, branding her and worshiping her. He did it all before the sun peaked over the horizon the following morning.

When exhaustion finally claimed them, they slept wrapped together and barely stirred a single bit. Neither moving away, and if they did shift positions, they did it in sync so that they didn't part at all.

It was late morning before either of them woke. Lucius came awake first, his bare chest pressed into her naked back, his arm wrapped possessively around her as he held her close to him. Breathing deeply at the thought that this was just the first of many mornings to come.

He wasn't exactly certain when she had noticed him in his indoor pool, but he knew he'd been watching her for so long. Discretely, of course. Waiting for the time to be right, for the moment when instead of simply giving him a vague smile in greeting, she would look upon him as she had last night. Fully, longingly, passionately, and without another thought of anyone else in her head as she did so.

Now she was in his bed, after a night where he'd touched and tasted every inch of her lovely body, a night filled with her impassioned cries for him and only him, a night where he knew he'd found magnificence and refused to ever have anything less again.

He'd asked her if she really wanted a life full of mediocrity, but that is what he'd been living while waiting on her. He spoke of himself, as much as, he spoke of her that night in his office. He had wanted her to come to him, but only because, like her, he'd never truly believed that having what he wanted was possible.

As she continued sleeping, her hair a wild mass of curls that spread across her pillow, he couldn't help but think of what all last night had brought. From the moment she'd walked into his office, he'd been shocked to see her at all. Shocked that she'd asked if she could speak with him after the way she'd left the night of the party.

He'd done his best to hide it, but he'd seen a flicker in her eyes that said his surprise wasn't completely hidden. However, it was seeing her dressed as she was, the skirt and blouse showing hints of the curves he knew where hidden underneath, courtesy of her memories he'd taken, that had him confused. He hadn't understood why she would arrive dressed as she was, especially when she never really had before.

She always dressed casually when she visited his son and daughter-in-law. The only time she really dressed up was for a party she attended at his home. Which she didn't always attend anyway. Otherwise, the only time she wasn't in her muggle jeans or some other more comfortable attire, was if she by chance was still dressed for work.

The more she spoke last night, the more confused he'd become. It was obvious something had happened, something had brought her here, and when he'd learned her reasons, it had taken everything he had not to pounce on her. Which he kind of thought she expected in a way.

The way she'd looked at him several times while they spoke, it hinted at what she wanted, even before she told him that it was him specifically that she did indeed want. Hearing the words he'd hoped to for so long, it had been difficult to not take her at face value.

Knowing what he did, he had to be sure that she wasn't looking to do with him what she'd done with Black. Seeing the hints of doubt in her eyes at his words, he'd almost caved, almost said to hell with it and taken whatever he could have with her. But he knew if he did, he'd only kick himself later while calling himself a fool.

As much as he wanted her, he didn't want her unless it was for keeps. He didn't want a night of heaven, only spend the rest of his days in hell with wanting more than she was willing to give. So he'd pushed her, taunted her, even though he'd hated to see the flickering of her fire, the dousing of the flames at her thinking he was doing what others had done to her.

But she'd pushed through it, not letting those flames die out, and pushed right back until she understood what he wanted from her. That was the fire he'd wanted from her. He'd wanted her to raise her chin and tell him to go to hell. That she was worth more than what he'd implied with his harsh words, though she hadn't done that at all.

Seeing her frustration, he'd been unable to keep from give her a glimpse at his thoughts. Unable to keep from leading her towards what he wanted to hear from her. That tiny prodding, the hint that spoke of his own wanting of her too, had given her exactly what she needed guidance wise, and gotten him so much more than he'd thought he'd ever have.

He hadn't expected her to answer him in the way she had. To ask why they were still dressed. He'd expected something slower with the flames barely having been lit inside her again. Expected her to retreat a tiny bit after admitting what she wanted, instead she'd surprised him with her words, which was why he was hesitant at first when he'd kissed her. Then, she surprised him again at just how passionate she truly was.

He couldn't understand how any man could walk away after having her in his bed. She was both innocent and sinful, giving and demanding, shy and vivacious. She was so many things all wrapped in one, that he'd been hard-pressed to not only keep up, but to keep from simply pinning her to the bed and taking all she had to give him. Though, he was sure there had been a bit of that included as well during their many long and interesting bouts of play.

All of it had him completely stumped on how any man could not want her more after having her. Stumped on how her recently discarded lover, her bit of fluff, as she had thought of the man, had been capable of wanting anyone else either with having had her for so long.

_Idiots, all of them,_ he decided as his hand smoothed down her side. He knew what he'd found, what he now had, and he was a very smart man. A smart man who wouldn't let this petite little witch get even an inch from him with thoughts of anything but returning again in her head.

Feeling her stir, he debated between breakfast with his family, and breakfast in bed with newly acquired lover. A small grin curving his lips, he knew exactly which one he'd be choosing. It wasn't like he didn't see his son and daughter-in-law on a regular basis anyway. Besides, how often did one get to dine with a delicious and naked witch, such as her, the morning after taking her to bed the first time?

Needless to say, they didn't leave the master bedroom for any reason that day. Draco knew not to disturb him when he was confined to his chambers unless it was important. Draco would insure Ginny didn't disturb him either.

Breakfast the following morning was an interesting affair to say the least. Hermione came down with him, wearing a dressing gown of his shrunken down to fit her, since the elves had confiscated her clothes to wash them before she could done them again.

He saw the nervous fidgeting she was doing as she walked with him down the stairs towards the dining room, but kept his silence about it. Letting her handle her own thoughts and worries, curious to see how she reacted to the other occupants of the house when they saw her. He'd be ready to jump in if he was needed, otherwise, he wasn't going to push just yet.

When he entered the dining room, Draco nodded at him before going back to his breakfast, but his head jerked up a moment later at seeing who was with him, with his eyes wide in shock. Ginny, on the other hand, had seen right away who was with him and her jaw dropped. It didn't take much to figure out why Hermione came in with Lucius. Her hair was a tousled mess, even after she'd combed it out, and the robe screamed overnight guest. Since neither had known her to be there at all, she obviously hadn't been there for them.

Hermione had to fight to keep her laughter at bay at the surprise on Ginny's face and the shocked confusion on Draco's. Though the confusion part didn't last long. Especially when Lucius pulled out a chair for Hermione right beside him at the head of the table. Which was right across from Draco's seat.

Still fighting the laugh clawing to get out, which washed all nervousness away, she gave them a smile. "Good morning." She said, somewhat cheerfully.

Draco at that point looked at his father, who had a hint of amusement in his eyes at her greeting to the two still staring. Ginny finally closed her mouth, and a hint of a smirk curved her lips as she said her own good morning. Though she did give Hermione a look that said 'we're so talking about this later'. Hermione gave her a tiny nod before reaching for her coffee cup that Lucius had filled for her.

Draco lasted a good five minutes before he couldn't contain himself any longer. Manners be damned. "What the bleeding hell is the meaning of this?" His hand pointed at Hermione.

It had taken awhile to get him calmed down and Hermione was proud that she held her laughter in the whole time. Though it almost slipped out several times.

Ginny had pulled her aside and into a sitting room since Draco had demanded to speak with his father in private and with a mild squeal at Hermione arriving with Lucius did her own demanding. Though Hermione was positive that Draco probably wasn't nearly as pleased as Ginny seemed to be.

Learning that the redhead had been aware of Lucius' interest and purposely took Hermione through the indoor pool so she'd see him swimming, had stunned the curly haired brunette. "You knew?" Hermione asked when she could finally speak again.

Ginny sighed. "You think I hadn't noticed how he would find a reason to come into a room we were in after you had arrived, even if only for a few moments? Or that he'd perk up if you were mentioned in a conversation? I was raised with brothers, I know when men are interested and don't want it known. Why do you think I made sure he was around to overhear when Draco and I would discuss your love life?"

Hermione bit back a fresh laugh at that. "Then, why did you push me towards Draco's friend the night of the Christmas Party?"

Ginny shrugged. "I'd hoped that it would push Lucius to make a move finally. What finally did it anyway?"

Hermione took a deep breath, deciding it was time to tell some of what she'd been doing the last few years. "I have a secret." She started.

Ginny's mouth dropped more and more as Hermione went on. Hermione almost decided to leave out details, but decided what the hell, and spilled it all. When she was done, Ginny's jaw was almost on the floor and it took her a bit to speak again.

With a shake of her head, Ginny finally spoke. "You're telling me that you took hair from Sirius and used Polyjuice to shag his brains out, with some guy that had you taking a potion too? Bloody hell, why didn't I think of that?"

Hermione frowned at the last part of Ginny's statement, but the redhead snorted out a laugh before speaking again. "You think you're the only one that ever wanted to sleep with someone that they couldn't have? Hell, Hermione, I'd have snagged more than just one wizard's hair if I'd had Polyjuice available. The list could go on for ages. There is...Sirius, Remus, Professor Snape..."

Hermione cut her off. "What? Professor Snape? Really?"

Ginny smirked. "Are you telling me you never sat in his class, all but melting as he gave his lectures? The man is sex on a stick, wrapped in chocolaty voiced goodness. You had to have thought it at least once."

Hermione stared at her stunned for several moments. "Er...well...I hadn't thought about it before, no."

Ginny smirked. "And now?" Seeing Hermione pondering that one as she sat there.

The smile that curved Hermione's lips said enough. Ginny folded her arms as she spoke smugly. "See. Sex on a stick. I cannot believe you didn't make more use of what you had at your disposal."

Hermione laughed softly. "Where does the stick part come into play?"

At Ginny's wiggled brow, Hermione shook her head as she spoke again. "Never mind, I don't think I want to know. But...I got caught trying to snag a hair from Lucius, what do you think would have happened had I tried to take..."

But at that moment the doors opened and Lucius walked inside, ending their discussion. Ginny quickly found a reason to leave the room, something about getting dressed and searching for her husband, which left the two of them alone.

Hermione found out that while Draco wasn't overly pleased at the moment, he was at least keeping an open mind to the idea. When Lucius asked if she had a pleasant discussion with Ginny and gotten things squared away, he'd seen a sparkle in her eyes when she said that yes she had. One that had him curious what exactly had been discussed, but again Hermione pointed out that some conversations where best kept between those involved in them only.

He hadn't like it, but she found a very good way to distract him from pressing the issue any farther. One that kept them occupied a good chuck of the morning before she said she had to go home.

It didn't take long before Hermione found her nights spent mostly in Lucius' bed. The few she wasn't in his, he was in hers. He refused to spend any more nights without her beside him. Something she found she really liked as well.

Now, they were headed towards their two year anniversary. She had given up all pretenses of having her own place within the first year and moved in with him at the Manor. It wasn't like she spent much time in her flat anyway with all the time she was at the Manor. While Draco was still very adamant about wards and silencing charms in place at all times before anything started, he was much more easy about the whole relationship.

Now as they neared their third Christmas spent together, the first being within a matter days of them getting together, Hermione had a sinking suspicion at what Lucius' present this year would entail. The odd looks from Draco, the extra smiles from Ginny, even Lucius' strange behavior, all of it pointed to one thing in her mind.

It was something that she hadn't really thought about before, but now that she had a feeling what was going to happen, she'd taken the time to properly way the pro's and con's of such a gift. Already had her answer ready for him, assuming she was right.

If she was wrong, she didn't care. She already knew she loved him, and that he loved her, both having admitted as much to each other before she even moved in. Though it had been harder for him to actually say the words than it had been for her. Something she was surprised at finding wasn't as hard for her to say considering her past history with such things.

However, with the festive holiday nearing, the ball that started it all set to happen that very night, Hermione knew that if Lucius asked, she'd tell him yes. That she would indeed marry him. Knew she would except the ring she was sure he'd give her on Christmas morning, and never have any regrets about accepting it either.

During the Christmas celebratory ball, Hermione mingled with their guest, Lucius arm around her waist, sometimes moving his hand up her bare back to trace her spine as they went from group to group. The tingles his fingers caused, as he traced along her naked flesh, had her aware of him all night. Creating warmth that spread through her whole body, as she spoke to different ones.

The smile on her face never faltered, even when he let his fingers dip into the very low back that barely covered her bum. Grazing the top of the rounded flesh, before moving back to a more appropriate level on her back. He already knew what she wore underneath the silk that clung to her body, not much at all. Only her stockings and that was it. The cut didn't allow for a bra, and tight sheath would have shown the lines of her knickers, so she was naked underneath.

Something Lucius was aware of, and it had him distracted all night. Itching to peel the dress from her, so he could sink into her softness and not come up for air until morning. He couldn't complain at the distraction with her lack of attire under the dress, he had been the one to pick it out and purchase it for her.

As the night wore on, they danced many dances and Lucius was even more aware of the sensual woman in his arms, as much as she was aware of him. Even after two years, they still lusted for each other constantly. Something he was very happy to find, though his son was less pleased over it. Especially, since Draco would find his hand flying away from the handle of the library sometimes and quickly figure out who was inside and why they didn't want to be disturbed or interrupted.

At the end of the night, he led his beautiful witch to their bedroom, and after stripping the wonderful silk gown from her body, he made love to her. Both frenzied at this point with the touches and looks they'd shared all night.

It wasn't long before he was buried deeply inside her, riding her hard and deep. Her passionate cries echoing off the walls around them. Her scream of pleasure only making him work harder for the next one.

Her leg hooked over his shoulder, he hammered into her. Still unable to get enough of her, still convinced the men from her past were complete idiots for letting her get away. Her nails raked down his back, his groan of bliss harsh as he neared his own release, he gave her everything inside him.

She screamed his name, just as sweetly and passionately as she had the first time he'd taken her to his bed. Her pulsing and clenching walls pulled him with her into ecstasy with a loud roar of his own as he exploded inside her.

Both panting, he kept as much of his weight off of her as possible, even as she tried to pull him down on top of her fully. She loved feeling his weight pressing her into the mattress, and he usually gave in, but only until he had the strength to move off of her. To roll them over so that she was resting on his chest instead of him on her.

When she was on his chest, his hands tracing her spine again, he closed his eyes in contentment. This woman was his and he loved her deeply. He knew she loved him in return and that alone amazed him every time she said the words. Which she did often, not to reassure him, not to convince either of them of it, but because she couldn't contain the blissful feeling inside her and had to share it with him. The words, along with the look in her eyes as she said them, had his heart melting each and every time.

Some might say he'd gone soft, and maybe he had. However, he found he didn't care. His reason for his softness, the woman in his arms, she made any normal derisive thoughts about such softness fade away like they never existed. She was the only one he was soft with anyway. Otherwise, he was just as he had been with anyone else.

"Lucius?" She whispered, bringing him out of his thoughts.

"Yes, my love?" He replied quietly.

He felt her lips curve against his chest. "I love you." She said, her voice still whisper soft.

His eyes still closed, he breathed deeply, feeling his heart melting once again at hearing her say those three words to him. "Marry me." He said in return, though that wasn't what he'd instructed his brain to say.

Realizing what came out of his mouth, he frowned slightly. He'd meant to say that he loved her too. However, he knew he wouldn't take the words back, he' already planned on asking her, just not like this. He'd planned something much more romantic for when he asked her.

Hermione's lips curved even more, she knew those words had been coming. Not tonight, but she knew it would have been soon. "Yes."

He brought his hand to her chin, lifting it so he could look into her eyes. "Yes?"

Her smile still in place she nodded as she looked into his silver eyes. "Of course, yes. Did you honestly believe I'd give you any other answer?"

His smile forming, shifted them, making her sit up as did so himself. Her legs straddling him, as he held her by her waist. "I wasn't sure if you'd want to be my wife. Are you sure?"

She wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'm positive, my love."

He brought her mouth to his, kissing her with all the love he felt inside him. His hands holding her tightly to him, though the kiss was gentle and sweet.

All of this started with a secret, one that she'd felt shame in having at all. Now, she couldn't imagine how her life would have turned out, had her secret not been shared with the man that held her. The man that caught her trying to steal a hair and forced her to tell him her secret.

Now as he brought her back down to the their bed, ready to love her again, ready to cherish and treasure her with his lips and body, she couldn't help but give to thanks to any omnipresent being that was listening for him having caught her, pushed her, and loved her.

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_**A/N: ** I hope you all liked how I ended this. Take care everyone and please leave me your thoughts._


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